Her FOUR YEAR OLD SHOULDERS.
(I still don't understand why her Grandma sent her that sundress. Doesn't she know four year olds shouldn't dress like harlots?)
(I know some people think that Mormon children should abide by Mormon adult modesty standards because someday, as adults, if they choose to wear garments, they will need to cover their shoulders. This, they believe, avoids any future confusion over changing standards. I'm personally not on board with that. I don’t believe changing the standards of what is appropriate to wear at various ages is confusing or difficult for children. Different ages come with different responsibilities. We don't make five year old girls wear bras because someday they will have breasts and we don't want them to struggle with that. They wear bras when it is appropriate to wear them. Our children are not simple minded, they can grasp that concept. But I know that's a common feeling, and hey, different strokes. But age appropriateness is not what bothers me the most about all of this.)
I am really tired of the way in which we try to make women responsible, through their clothing choices, for the behavior, thoughts, and spirituality of men.
Read that again. They are so worried about tempting the fathers of their peers, that they felt uncomfortable, AT GIRLS CAMP, wearing swimsuits while swimming.
This is what we've taught them, that men are unable to control themselves, that the sight of girlish shoulders and thighs will present such a great temptation that even stalwart men will be tempted beyond all imagination.
And that this is the responsibility of the young women.
Because how on earth are these guys going to function out in the real world? Because, guess what, they WILL encounter attractive, shapely young women out in the world and will have to find some way to deal with it. It reminds me of the recent incident where a group of Orthodox Jewish men in Israel spit on an 8 year old as she was walking to school because they felt her uniform wasn't modest enough.
I think this is the natural result of spending so many years emphasizing hyper-modesty (instead of actual modesty in thought and action), dress, and appearance. We've now hypersexualized our young women to the point that a young girl wearing a perfectly acceptable and non-sexual outfit gets harassed at a church school. What's next, burkas for everyone?
Guess what guys, if your son can't control himself when he sees my daughter's SHOULDER, that's on your son, not my daughter.
(I kid you not, I witnessed this in primary last year - it consisted of “touch your head – is anything showing? Touch your toes, is anything showing?” I wanted to blurt out “do a cartwheel IS ANYTHING SHOWING? FOR SHAME FOR SHAME”).
I do not want them bringing home articles about sundresses. I do not want them learning that they are walking pornography.
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