Monday, March 10, 2008

My Husband is a Patient, Patient Man

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“Hon, I think I have narcolepsy.”

“You don’t have narcolepsy.”

“But it says right here on Wikipedia ---“

(muttering) “Oh freakin’ A. Here we go...”

“It says a person with narcolepsy is likely to become drowsy or to fall asleep, often at inappropriate times and places.“

“(silence due to excessive eye rolling)”

“Oh my gosh. That’s SO ME.

“That’s so everybody. That’s called – being an adult with small children.”

“And it says daytime naps may occur without warning and may be physically irresistible... Holy crap. I TOTALLY HAVE NARCOLEPSY.

“You don’t have narcolepsy.”

“But what do you call it when I fall asleep instantaneously after I lie down?”

“Really, really annoying.”

50 comments:

  1. And it is probably hereditary. I remember feeling the same way from time to time. I even used to fall asleep while waiting at a red light and in the middle of giving a piano lesson. "Teacher, um, how was that?
    Were you listening with your eyes shut?"

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  2. Oh Sue, I love you.

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  3. It's also called being and adult with teenagers who won't go to bed.

    G'nite!

    p.s. Did you know today was National Sleep at Work Day? I gotta get me one of these.

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  4. LOL...that's too funny. I must have it too because I swear that since I had a child I can fall asleep standing up.

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  5. all the way laughed out loud!

    my husband feels your husband's pain.

    oh yes he does.

    but i feel ya, sistah! i have been telling my hubby I have african sleeping sickness for YEARS!

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  6. I can SO totally relate! Only it's my husband that can fall asleep immediately while I lie awake for hours. It makes me want to pinch him! Which I never, never do...very much.

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  7. Your husband and my husband are so alike. Once I said, "You know what? I think I should get tested for Chronic Fatigue Syndrome." My husband said, "I have Chronic Fatigue Syndrome, too. It's called LIFE."

    Oh. Well.... sputter... sputter. Game, Set Match. Two sentences.

    I hate it when he does that.

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  8. I know exactly what my husband would say if I told him I had narcolepsy--but it would be dirty and I couldn't tell you here.

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  9. Ha! If that's narcolepsy, my husband has it too. And I agree, it's really, really annoying. :) I wish I had it too!!!

    :)

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  10. ROFL! You are such a hoot, Sue!

    I do the same thing to my husband, except it's usually in the middle of the night (and usually has to do with the kids being sick and me being sleep-deprived), and he gets mad at me for waking him up to ask him if we should maybe go to the E.R., then rolls over and goes back to sleep calm-as-you-please, while I lay awake and fret, and always for nothing, because everything is fine the next morning.

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  11. Sue...I love love love reading your blog. I don't often comment (how can I follow you?) but I love it.

    My night consisted of being suddenly awoken by shrieks coming from my boys' room. The little one had peed in his bed and was obviously not happy about it. Because I wear ear plugs (can anyone say, sanity saver?), my husband was removing the sheets on the bed when I sauntered in. I went to calm the naked hysterical child, got some clothes on him and took him to bed with me. Yes, he smelled like the urine of a boy who doesn't drink enough. But I didn't care. The next three hours went like this, worry worry, close eyes, more worry, alarm clock ringing. Wake up. Sweet! Rock on sweet rocker.

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  12. Well, it sure feels like narcolepsy, doesn't it? It hits immediately when I sit in a chair with a small child and a Curious George book.

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  13. Your husband is right. We all have narcolepsy. Or insomnia. I usually have both on the same night.

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  14. I know, I used to have insomnia quite frequently. It mysteriously disappeared once the babies came. Who knew?

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  15. Reading medical symptoms always makes me paranoid. I think I have every disease.

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  16. I call it sleep deprived. Been there doing that, we are now in year 11 of it. Not including all the previous biological/foster littles and assorted sleep deprivations previous to Little Man.
    Naps are mandatory.

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  17. Ahhh, wikpedia. gotta love it.

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  18. I get alternating narcolespsy and insomnia.

    Both drive my husband crazy, because we've never on the same page as far as sleep.

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  19. Sounds like you could be a hazard to yourself back in Nevada this summer.

    Don't narcolept outside on a sunny, summer day!

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  20. Sue, you are too funny! As long as you don't suddenly think you have Kleptomania. People will stop inviting you over. :)

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  21. narcolepsy?! hahaha that is soo very funny.

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  22. Really really annoying... LOL!!! That made me laugh out loud! My husband would agree... LOL!!!

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  23. K ~ Too Funny! I LOL when he said really, really annoying.

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  24. My Hubbs and you husband should go out for beers. My husband's favorite line?? "Stop being so greedy with that thang." LOL.. Sometimes I just. want. to. sleep. Don't touch me (unless it's to rub my hair or hold me, dammit. And stop poking me, you'll never get any that way!). Oh sorry!! LOL

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  25. Ohmygosh that sounds like my husband! Did he add a snort to go with the eye rolling?

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  26. That sounds just like our conversations. My husband sometimes kicks me to wake me up because he's SO annoyed by HOW fast I can fall asleep.

    But I kick him to go get the baby when he cries, so it evens out.

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  27. How funny! I think my husband has it too - and, it is really annoying!!

    Hope you are having a good week Sue - see you later. Kellan

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  28. Ha ha! I'm with you're hubby. My hubby can fall asleep at the drop of a hat, dead asleep, and it is really, REALLY annoying. ;)

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  29. Oh my gosh! That is so my husband, except he does this gutteral groan every time I start in... especially after all those crazy drug commercials. This was us last night:
    Me: Omg! that is totally me. I can't sleep at night.
    Him: woman! you do not have restless leg syndrome or have a need for the little purple pill.
    Me: seriously. i sometimes feel like that.
    him: no. you. don't.
    me: ya-huh!
    him: no. you just need a little anti-crazy pill thats all.
    me: rude!

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  30. Haven't we talked about not using the internet to self-diagnose? You and Damien could have a hypo party where you call out your symptoms to each other wihlst scouring the internet and whoever finds the best-fitting illness for the other's symptoms first wins. Like a neurotic form of bingo.

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  31. I was once tested for narcolepsy.
    Apparently I DON'T have it.

    Got any other ideas?

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  32. I believe I quoted you today. Could you tell me which post it came from so I can link back to it? (I received the quote indirectly.) Thank you ever so much!

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  33. that sounds like the conversation my husband and i have on repeat every time i try the symptom checker on webmd.

    so far i have hyperthyroidism, depression, croup, and eczema...

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  34. I don't have narcolepsy but I sure fake it a lot.

    Like at 3 am when the dumb dog wants out, I'm dead asleep everytime.

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  35. "being an adult with small children.”
    hehehehe....I nearly peed myself trying not to laugh so loud.

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  36. I love your new header, I finally get a good look at you! You're GORGEOUS! I knew you had to be b/c your kids are sooo dang cute, but then it might have come all from your husband and you could have been butt ugly, glad to see that isn't the case. I mean a man did give you his number at Micky D's, you have to be hot.

    Now go take a nap!

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  37. Isn't this internet stuff fun...!? :D

    I LOVE being able to Google and find out exactly what is wrong with me, and not have to spend money to go have some doctor guy GUESS, er uh, I mean DIAGNOSE what's going on.

    It's so convenient!!

    Hope your narcolepsy improves... :S

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  38. Chanel - it's just a really good picture. Trust me. (Ask Holly, she won't lie.) Cute but chunky is about the most I can aspire to.

    But thanks :>

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  39. nice... I wish I had that some days.

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  40. I'm the world's worst hypochondriac. The worst.

    BTW- I'm hosting a little contest on my blog. Free cake and all. :D

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  41. Shazane!11:05 AM

    I'm so glad I convinced you to send me the link to your blog. You are an extremely talented and witty writer. I very much enjoy your style - I'm sure there's a publisher out there somewhere just waiting to announce he wants to make your life into a book (or at least a lifetime movie).

    I can totally picture your husband and all his eye-rolling. I may have even seen it happen. You guys make me laugh.

    And about the run (diarrhea-like run) of bad luck you have had financially recently, if I were your neighbor, I would totally think that you were resourceful, hard-working, intelligent people who had a great idea for a business, that everyone totally thought you'd be millionaires off of and that everyone was rooting for you to make a million dollars off of, and that things just went horribly wrong based on some stupid clients not paying. If I were your neighbor, we'd still love you and miss you and our little girls would cry that your little girls were leaving, and we wouldn't care one bit if there happened to be a "Bank Owned" sign swinging from your house.

    I'm just guessing what your neighbors are probably thinking, but I think I have a pretty good idea.

    You ARE a total rock star!

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  42. lol...you are hilarious! I wish I had this problem. It takes me at least 20 minutes to fall asleep.

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  43. I have narcolepsy too! Do you sleep through earthquakes, storms, and dogs jumping on you, too?

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  44. Many, many women suffer from narcolepsy. It's one of the most underdiagnosed conditions :)

    Heidi

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  45. I'm glad you know I wouldn't lie. And Chanel is right, sorry. You're beautiful. You always look great & dressed cute too. So, I pretty much hate you. hahaha

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  46. LMAO. And I thought I was a hypochondriac! *G*

    But I agree with hubby...really ,really annoying...especially to a insomniac like me :P

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  47. OMG I have been laughing for about ten minutes after reading this. Really, really annoying. You crack me up!

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  48. I really do have narcolepsy and it sucks! You don't want it, but it can be amusing and an excuse to get out of things like driving and jury duty. Wait, did I just admit that out loud? ...

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