Thursday, June 26, 2008

Losing It

Pin It I recently took a personality test that indicated that I was, among other things, "easily distracted and prone to losing things."

There are so many things to say about my new label (isn't it pretty?), but right now I just want to talk about how I'm prone to losing things. Because boy howdy, am I ever prone.

PRONE. (That suddenly doesn't look like a real word to me. PRONE.)

My mom used to call me the absent minded professor, and I used to think that was sort of cute. But it's not. It's not cute at all. I'm so tired of losing my stuff.

I'm constantly losing things - my keys, my rollerblades, my daughter's lunchbox, my keys again, my shoes, my shoes again, my shoes again some more, my cell phone, the house cordless phone, my keys again, my purse, my debit card, my debit card, my debit card, my purse - all day long it goes on.

I'm so glad I have this valuable new tool, the personality type, to help me rationalize away all of my personal failings.

"Honey, you've got to start putting your keys in the same place every time you get home so that you can find them easily."

"I can't do that!"


"Because I'm an ENFP!"

"That prevents you from trying to keep track of your stuff?"

"I can't fight science!"

Before I knew about my ENFP illness, I was starting to think I had holes in my brain. Perhaps some flesh eating bacteria had crawled inside and eaten away the part of my brain that knew where I put my shoes. Because I sure couldn't find them.

So it's kind of a relief. (WHEW.)

Maybe I should give it a try though, the whole putting-stuff-back-in-a-place-where-it-would-logically-go-so-that-I-can-find-it-again THING. Yesterday I used my debit card to pay a bill online, set it down next to the computer when I was done and then walked around all day long looking for it, mystified. Where could it be? Where? Where where where where where? I couldn't imagine.

Tonight I looked for my rollerblades for twenty minutes. TWENTY MINUTES. And the house is perfectly clean right now. My closet is even organized. I just couldn't find them.

"They've vanished," I said to my husband. "I think they disapparated."

"Look in the garage," he said.

And there they were.

He always knows where my stuff is. I used to just call him at work all the time to ask him where my stuff was, but now, because of his job, I can't do that. (It's very inconsiderate of him to have a job like that, I think.)

Sometimes I think he's hiding my stuff just to mess with me, except I know it frustrates him too, the fact that I can never keep track of anything, ever. He knows the last five minutes before we go anywhere will involve what he calls the "walk and mutter." (Well. Walk and mutter and rant and rave.)

"I can't find my shoes. Where are my shoes? They were just here. They were just here. Who took my shoes? Who took them? DOG, did you take my shoes? Because I will kill you. I will kill you if you took my shoes. Who took them? Where are they? Where? Where? WHERE?! Oh look, right there in the closet."

Sometimes I even lose stuff inside my purse. That might not sound all that strange except that my purse is small, almost like a wallet, and there isn't much inside of it. And yet, within it's non-depths I can still repeatedly lose my debit card and driver's license. Even though they are, in fact, still right there in my purse. I'll be at the check-out and I'll go to pull out my debit card and - uh oh, it's not there. It's SIMPLY NOT THERE. I'll pull everything out, look at it and put it back in and it's STILL not there. I'm frantic. Where is it? Where could it be? Is it lost? Is it stolen? Is it disapparated? In another dimension?

And then, WHAM, suddenly it's there.

It happens a lot. (Sometimes I think it's some kind of brain magic. Just - not a good kind. But kind of tricky, all the same.)

Before Fathers Day, I hid one of my husband's presents. I remember thinking that I would remember where I put it. I remember very specifically saying to myself, oh, sure, you'll remember putting it there, no problem.



I still can't find it.

Sometimes I'll hide treats from the kids, because if they find the cookies they'll never make it into my daughter's lunchbox. Except then I forget where I hid them. It's kind of nice though because sometimes I'll be having a bad day and I'll open a cupboard door and - Oh, LOOK, OREOS FROM HEAVEN.

YUM, Oreos.

Oh. Whoops, I got distracted. (We INFPs tend to do that.) Sorry - I know that's irritating. I BLAME SCIENCE.


  1. "I can't fight science!"

    Perfect. :)

    I don't usually lose things, but if I put something in a place "that I'll remember" I always forget. I'm always forgetting where I hid presents. Presents from me are often late. Sometimes months and months late.

  2. We ENFPs have to stick together, you know, if we could actually organize the meeting, locate our car keys, remember not to leave the baby in the car, forget the exit because we were day dreaming about our dream wedding (even though we're already married) and then not try to outdo each other while at lunch (which we'll move spontaneously while forgetting to tell the others and losing the cell phone numbers of the remaining half.)

    We're a barrel of monkeys!

  3. Anonymous3:02 AM

    Ha! I KNEW you were an ENFP! I'm an INFP. Losing stuff and daydreaming is something I'm very good at too. It's a skill you know, being in another world.

  4. "Can't fight science." Hahahaha! Love it.

  5. Hilarious. Really,

  6. Anonymous5:59 AM

    The problem isn't a lack of memory, it's a surplus of imagination. Unlike those robotic STJ types, we NFP folks can imagine all sorts of perfectly wonderful reasons an object could/should be somewhere other than it is. We can imagine why the debit card we used moments ago could be in a trunk in the attic or our shoes in the freezer.

    NFP-ness is a blessing, not a curse. If the world were more just, we NFPs would be supplied with people to take care of mundane tasks like locating objects. We would have servants. I can imagine why we'd be entitled. Now I just need to find where they're hiding.

  7. Anonymous6:08 AM

    I too put important things in "special places" and can never find them. One thing is guaranteed, however. If it's something that has an expiration date or it's so important I end up replacing it I will always find it right after it expires or I replace it.


  8. "I think they disapparated."

    Hahahahahahahahaha! :)

    Seriously, I am LOVING your blog. (I found you at Rocks in My Dryer.)

  9. Oh, I've done that "oreos from heaven" thing! It's fun. Makes me think having Alzheimers might not be so bad - everything is such a pleasant surprise: "You're my daughter? Hey, I have a daughter! Cool!"

  10. Anonymous7:17 AM

    I never have Oreos from heaven, but I do sometimes have magical dark chocolate that appears out of thin air.

  11. we only have the N and the F in common, yet I can second this entire post. scatter-brained to the core of my being.
    Thank you for making me laugh.
    I beg you not to do as I do and try to find the lost things in your purse WHILE your driving. It's not safe. A person should really keep their cell phone in plain view, able to chat on while driving at any given moment.

  12. Too funny!

    You're right. You can't fight science. It would go against the laws of nature.

    I've found that even when you do put something in the same place so you can remember where you put it, someone else will come along and move it for you. I think it's those short people living in my house.

    I once found a 5 lb bag of leftover Halloween candy from heaven. In January.

  13. Anonymous8:12 AM

    I think my kids hide my stuff just to mess with me. Like the money that was in my wallet, I swear it was there earlier.

  14. Try this test for a laugh, or perhaps a closer look at yourself than you ever wanted. Because it's fun.

  15. Anonymous8:27 AM

    So THAT's what this has been about since your! It's nice to finally have an answer. It's a good thing we all love you anyway.

  16. I love that you still haven't found the Father's Day present. :o) I'm crazy about quizzes, so thanks for the link!

  17. Anonymous8:40 AM

    By the way, Sue. I'm an ISFJ, like 13.7% of the population No wonder it has taken all these years to understand you.

  18. Last year I hid a few of Dear Son's Christmas gifts and then made a note on my blog so I'd remember where they were.

    I'm still looking for some photos I had printed, oh back in January. I put them up somewhere. You know "up," the mystical, magical, safe place so you won't lose or forget? Yeah.

  19. ~sniff sniff~ I used to feel so alooooone!

    Thank you Sue!

  20. My folks said I would lose my head if it wasn't attached. Nice.

    "Can't fight science" - classic!

  21. I posted that test on June 6th! Humpf. But ignoring that fact, there is this fact! YOU and I and Azucar are all ENFP. Totally agree on the losing stuff part. I drive myself nuts. How in heaven's name I can lose something I just had in my hand is beyond me, but I do it, ALL the time. Ask my everloving and patient hubby.
    Now if I can just figure out how come my fellow ENFP gets WAY more comments than I do....

  22. P.S. Here is the link to that post
    And a much nicer version of the traits of an ENFP.

  23. Jo - I just read your post! When I took the test I was 51% E and 49% I, and so I'm JUST BARELY an ENFP, which seems just about right because I'm friendly but not terribly outgoing. I like to be social, but I'm not a social butterfly.

  24. I love blaming anything on science! Anytime I can deflect my crazy antics on something I do. I love your blog, been reading it for sometime now, can't tell you how much I love it!!! My husband even gets quite a kick out of some of your posts. Thanks for being so willing to share your life with us all. Congrats on the whole house thing!!

  25. Ahh, I knew we had some serious science in common!
    I love that you call (or used to) your husband at work to find stuff. I am ALWAYS calling my husband. Where is the___ Did you move the___?
    He's going to get a big reward in Heaven because he never yells at me. He may roll his eyes, but it probably doesn't count, because I can't see that through my phone.
    He still teases me about the time I lost my keys for 2 whole weeks. You know where they were? In my coat pocket. It was November--I was wearing that coat the whole time. I just didn't know about that pocket. It was 13 years ago, and he still tells me to check my pocket whenever I can't find something.

  26. ENFPs unite!

    Alan, may I quote you forever? "The problem isn't a lack of memory, it's a surplus of imagination." Yeah!

    Seriously though, I lose everything. It's horribly embarrassing and very frustrating. I currently have [an amount I refuse to admit] in cash in an envelope in the house--somewhere. I think it may be in the baby's old crib. I really need to get on finding it, but there's always something else that looks more inviting.

  27. Anonymous11:03 AM


    AHAHAhahahahahaha!!! That was great!!

    I like to say that I have a mind like a steel sieve. :)

  28. I am always, always losing things. And my hunband is always (somewhat patiently) trying to find them. The most annoying question: "Where's the last place you had it?" How would I know?

    I also am famous for forgetting why I entered a room during the act of entering the room. Thank you so much for giving me the scientific explanation. Can't fight science, you know.


  29. You should check out There's SO much information on brain typing there, it's awesome! My brother-in-law is looking into doing it professionally and our family is pretty into it. It's definitely interesting and helps you understand why you are the way you are. I'm an ESFJ by the way, as is Monica from friends, if that gives you any idea how anal that brain type can be :)

  30. That was just hilariously funny! Nothing makes me want to cuss more than when I lose something that was just in my hand a minute ago.

  31. Too funny! I am too scared to get my personality type. I'm sure I wouldn't be able to handle it.

  32. Walk and mutter.
    LOVE it.
    Done it.
    Way too many times.

  33. hehehe. I was lost a pencil I was just using. I looked for it for 20 minutes. Then I found it. I was holding it in my mouth. Yep. Happens all the time. Welcome fellow loser!

  34. OMG, I'm laughing so hard.

    The "oreos from heaven" part took me from giggling to a full fledged out loud laugh. That was great.

    My husband is the "loser" in our family. He loses his keys, losing his ball caps, loses his ipod (we're on ipod #2 for just that reason), losing his cell phone. I don't think a day goes by with him saying "Hey, have you seen my____?"

  35. I loved this post! You can't fight science- love it!!! I'm an ISTJ, which makes me socially awkward, but brainy. LOL!

  36. I blame my lost stuff on the gnomes. They especially love to cross-dress with my jewelry.

  37. Oh, good! There's a name for the problem I have. Thank you SO MUCH for finding it for me. I'm pretty sure I'm an ENFP, too (sometimes). My husband is an ENFP whenever he opens the refrigerator. "Wife, where's the mustard?" "On the shelf, husband." "Where wife?" "Husband, do you see the bright yellow bottle of stuff right at eye level?" "Oh, there it is." Mmm hmm. I think it happens to us all sometimes. :0)

  38. Anonymous3:33 PM

    I, too, am an ENFP!!! My husband is an INTJ. Go figure.

  39. Anonymous3:55 PM

    Ha ha, Oreos from heaven. I found Reeses peanut butter cups from heaven the other day. I remembered hiding them, but I thought I'd eaten them all already. How delightfully wrong I was.

  40. You are sooooooo funny. I think we have all done that to some extent, but man, you had me laughing at your description of wondering where, where, where could your credit card be and losing stuff in your wallet. Nicely played! Excellent post.

  41. Anonymous7:08 PM

    Funny post. Somehow with time I've changed from "losing everything" to being able to mostly keep track of things. Mostly. My husband calls my purse an abyss. Unlike you though, my purse IS really big, but I somehow still manage to lose things in it. Huh, maybe this is an affliction of all women?

    I don't know what my letters are, though I took the test some years ago - I'd like to take it again to see if I've changed, though.

  42. We actually have a rule in my house,"Never give anything to mom!" A couple of weeks ago we had some unexpected house guests and what do you suppose was the first piece of advice Mr. Smith gave our new friends about living in India? "Never ever give anything important to Mrs. Smith!" (Well really! You could at least warn them about Dengue Fever first.)

  43. I'm not the only one? Wow. Thank God. I thought I was alone in my absent mindness...where was I?

    Oh, finishing a comment...riiiight.

  44. I was going to post a witty comment, but I got distracted. I can't fight the science either. :)

  45. Hey, another ENFP! We should start a club/.

  46. Well, I took the test, and I am a ESTJ. Apparently I'm pretty judgemental, as the J portion came back at a whopping 82%! WoW!! I promise not to judge any of the rest of you - but can I change science a little bit so that part goes away? Yikes!

    This must be why I don't normally take personality tests. . .

  47. My sister is an ENFP. She's the most self-distracted person I know (also my best friend). "Time to do the dishes...Oh look, a bird!"
    I'm an ENFJ. I have ten siblings, we would kill each other without "Please Undersand Me" (its a book).

  48. I just took the test and I am an ISTP. Can we still be friends?

    "I think they disapparated." HAHAHA!!

  49. LOL! (several times!) Oh I needed that today. . .
    "DOG I will kill you. . . " and "disapparated".

    Hilarious, milady! Thanks for the laugh.

  50. heheh. i so love you. not in a creepy, weird kind of way. but, you know. you rock.

  51. Hilarious! My first stop by your blog and you are my newest subscribed feed. yay!

  52. Are you my long lost sister? I took that test too and ended up being an ENFP too. Mine said: "Journalist". Uncanny sense of the motivations of others. Life is an exciting drama. 8.1% of total population.

    I also tend to lose things in my purse. Like the time I was at Target with my 2 year old and 6 month old and swore up and down I lost my keys and dropped them in the store. I ended up having to call a family member to pick me up, just to discover them hidden in a pocket of my bag. SO BAD.

  53. Hey, I wrote a post called "Losing it" just a little while ago. (Like yours, my title is awesome, but unlike yours, the actual post is not funny and entertaining.)

    My rare "INFJ" personality type is apparently also the type that feels the need to pick the test apart.

  54. 2 years ago in March I hid a bag of dark chocolate cadbury eggs. Easter rolled around and I couldn't find them anywhere. I looked in all the usual places. Then I started yelling at the kids, and blaming them for eating them. December arrives, I am in the laundry room going through the food storage and what do I stumble across? The whole entire bag. Full and untouched. Derfwad, is the word I would use for me in this situation. I did apologize to the kids, unfourtunatly (sp) I think they might have been scarred for life.

  55. Anonymous6:33 PM

    Um...I just went and took that test (like I don't have enough to do?) and I'm the same as you!! ENFP. So no wonder we get on so well. :)

  56. Haha, I wonder if your husband would be able to find his present if you asked him where it was...

  57. Um, that would be me, the one with the black hole in the purse, and things have been known to jump from the dryer to an old suitcase in the spare room. ENFP's, unite! If you can remember to...

  58. LOL, wow...I don't know if I've ever laughed that hard while reading in my life. You are GREAT with words and now I know when I'm having a bad day where to come for a good laugh and some insight into this crazy world. LOL

  59. Anonymous12:05 PM

    LOL!! This is my first time at your site. I got here from Suburban Correspondent since she's been talking about you a lot. There's an email that floats around every now and then about how you know you have adult ADD. If you haven't seen it, it's hilarious...just like this post. I can't tell you how many times I've been out shopping and lots my keys or debit card in my diaper bag. Darn it but those things are huge. Too bad diapers are so big and the bags have to be so big! My toddler does often put things in different places than where I've left them. I've just taken to putting nails in the walls an hanging important things so high that she won't be able to reach them until she's 8. I can't lock things away because...i'll lose the key!!

  60. Anonymous10:30 PM

    Haha.. I'm so glad I have this valuable new tool, the personality type, to help me rationalize away all of my personal failings."

    I got ENTJ. Extroverted Intuitive Thinking Judging. Looks like I'm going to be career-obsessed when I'm older.