Friday, October 31, 2008

LOVE...... EXCITING AND NEW......

Pin It So now I'm thinking that whole pretend cancer victim blog I was planning to start would probably be a bad idea, right?

(I'm KIDDING - DO NOT EMAIL ME.)

My husband keeps telling me that I should write about my own hopeless crush, but the sheer volume of crushes I talked myself into makes that almost impossible. I think I had a crush on someone every year of my life, almost always with semi-tragic results - a tradition that kicked off with Michael in the fifth grade.

I was such a boy crazy freak. I don't know where it came from. Maybe too much Love Boat. (Disturbing fact: back in the day I thought Gopher was "so fine." GOPHER.) (shudder)

When I was twenty I fell madly in love with one of my best friends and spent the next year covertly trying to make him fall in love with me. When that didn't work, I wrote him a long passionate letter explaining how I felt. He wrote me back - a very sweet note, saying that he loved me as a friend, but gently letting me know that it was not happening - now or ever. I read it, cried over it, then decided the note obviously contained hidden meaning. Instead of it meaning that he was not in love with me, which is what it said, it actually could be interpreted to mean that he was TOTALLY in love with me and if I waited around long enough, ALL OF MY DREAMS WOULD COME TRUE. It was all in how you looked at it, really.

I decided that what I really needed to do was step it up to the next level (the level of being completely insane). I repeatedly demanded that he participate in long conversations all about why he couldn't just go ahead and fall in love with me because DUH, it was SUCH A GREAT IDEA. I was pretty sure I could eventually convince him to fall in love with me if I was persistent enough.

Me: But we're so perfect for each other.
Him: I like you a lot, but I don't like you in that way. Please, please stop it.
Me: OK. I get it. I do.
Me: But probably I should ask you again next week, right?
Him: (jams pencil into his brain)

One late night I went to the home of the bishop of my YSA ward (translation: leader of a church congregation for young single people). When he opened his front door I was standing there crying my eyes out. He invited me in, obviously thinking there had either been a) a murder or b) some kind of spiritual crisis I urgently needed to discuss.

I told him I had a terrible, terrible problem that only he could help me with, and that I really needed to talk to him RIGHT that second. He invited me into his family room, where I told him (between sobs) that my life was over, it was OVER, because my crush didn't love me back and never would, and he was seeing someone, and how would I ever get over this, and what oh what oh what should I DO?

You should've seen the look on his face. That poor man. (Being the bishop of a singles ward must totally suck.)

I have to hand it to him - he did give the advice thing the old college try, telling me that the kind of love you have to convince someone to feel for you would never make you happy. This is probably where I should've had an epiphany and recognized the wisdom in what he said, but at the time, I just thought he was nuts. Because OF COURSE it would make me happy. It didn't matter how it happened, it just mattered that it happen.

If I'd been a Harry Potter character I totally would've been Romilda Vane, trying to make Harry mine by spiking his punch with love potion. As far as I was concerned the whole concept of free will was for suckers who weren't trying hard enough.

Man. I was nuts.

100 comments:

  1. Hey, to an 8 year old, that snazzy white jacket with simulated brass buttons can TOTALLY make Gopher look HAWT! Glad to know that as an adult (and legislator) he ditched the cruise ship wardrobe, but, yeah. He was cute.

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  2. I don't get the whole "got yourself in a pickle thing". Aren't blogs anything you want them to be? Why would people be so upset over it. Goodness. Walks away shaking head...

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  3. I love the Love Boat title--just makes you want to sing, doesn't it? No wonder you had such insight on the whole Cordy situation! Write what you know, that's what they say. Anyway, I'm sorry that people are being pills about it--you don't deserve it. TAMN is probably cowering under the bedcovers wondering if she will ever be able to out herself (I'm guessing not).

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  4. im a boy stalker from way back. in grade school i handed out the "i like you; do you like me? check yes or no" notes at every opportunity. (ps im thinking about bringing back that format). i used to ride my bike past the neighbor boy's house relentlessly. when i got my driver's license--no boy was safe. & if anyone ever organized to showcase all the desperate love letters i have sent over the years--yikes! mj

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  5. Gopher? Oh sheesh.

    I wonder if there's anyone in this world who hasn't experienced unrequited love and the tragedy that it turns your life into.

    Probably not. And it's very tragic.

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  6. Ya know, I think you could get away with the pretend cancer thing.

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  7. At least now I know I wasn't the only boy crazy one.

    And reading that "other blog" I felt like I was reading my old high school and college journals.

    Ah, the good ol' days.

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  8. On the "My Super Hopeless Romance" front:

    Forgive yourself. You meant no malice, and the whole thing went out of control, fast. It wasn't an easy decision to 'fess up, and you did it in less than a month, even though it was getting harder every day to do so. You're remorseful, and you're willing to accept responsibility and take the consequences.

    So forgive yourself. I'm sure the One who actually matters already has.

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  9. while i hate (ABSOLUTELY HATE) to say it - - ever think about NOT re-writing Cordy&Seth on a blog and just making a novel out of it? You know you'd have at least a few thousand sales...

    Also, November is the best month for pushing out a novel! It is NaNoWriMo, after all. :)

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  10. I forgot about Gopher! He was cute, of course my memory might be foggy as I am getting much older . .. my memory has him looking like Wilson on House, which I think is extremely cute too!

    Great crush story!

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  11. I totally crushed on Gopher too.

    I wish there weren't so many love songs about unrequited love, because it only feeds the drama for young women. Really, if he doesn't love you on his own, you don't want it.

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  12. Now that Love Boat song is going around and around in my head. So thanks for that.

    Don't you think we've all been geeky in some way about this stuff? (I mean not as geeky as you, but still.. ;) ... )
    I think that's why people took such a liking to Cordy and were so emotionally involved with her. Because they saw pieces of themselves.

    I think that means you're a great writer, Sue. People really identified personally with your character.

    I guess that's both the good news, and the bad.

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  13. I always wished that I had a cute boy BFF to fall in love with. Alas, I was not so fortunate.

    I don't get the big deal about the other blog, honestly. I never felt like I was lied to or emotionally injured. That's just silly. It's not like any of these ladies would get an invite to "Cordy's" wedding anyways. :P

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  14. I am glad you turned your comments on. I read your whole other blog last night and LOVED it. I usually hate romance, but this was fun. It was even more fun knowing you were the one writing it and that it was just fiction. If it was not fiction, I don't think I could stomach her hopelessness! Love your style too. Thanks and can't wait for more!

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  15. I still say you publish Cordy - I said it before and I'll say it again.

    I still say you publish Cordy.

    We ALL felt just they way she did. That's why it was so great. ;o)

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  16. I think this whole thing is completely hilarious. People are so upset that they have taken the time to send you hate mail! Seriously? SERIOUSLY?

    It cracks me up. I'm sorry for having a laugh at your expense. It's not one of those "make fun of you" kind of laughs. Just a laugh at the situation.

    It makes me smile.

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  17. Sue, I swear you are the sweetest thing on legs. I wish I could go back and let your heartbroken 20-year old self talk talk talk until enough time had passed that you figured everything out.

    You did figure it out, and you have the skill to tap into our empathy. Just because Cordy's story is light and fluffy, it doesn't mean our dredged up emotions are, and you've definitely touched nerves there. You can use your powers for good if you choose.

    Write it. For real. Cordy can do some growing up along the way and discover what love should be. We all love happy endings. The pencil into the brain is maybe not it. ;-D

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  18. You are so funny. You make me laugh every day there is a new post (including the other blog). Hahaha. How are people really mad about this?

    Anyway, love your stories and the way you write them. Keep up the great work!!!

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  19. If I was a Harry Potter character I'd be J.K. Rowling, cause she's rich and can fly.

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  20. I know someone who did the same thing! They were like, "Well, he told me he wasn't into me, but he really must be telling me something different!"
    We're all so delusional.

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  21. wow really? people are that angry, huh? well... i'm a dork... i was reading the whole thing thinking it was real... but when things started to come together a little too perfectly, i'll admit i suspected... either way i was completely entertained for freeeeeeee! thanks sue, for saving me the cost of a movie ticket.

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  22. I think the whole Cordy thing was BRILLIANTE! (I'm kicking myself for not having thought of it myself.) Anything goes in blogland--surfer beware! I'll admit I did feel a bit of a let down when I discovered it was not real but you should consider that a compliment. That's what I want out of a good read: a good ol' emotional tweak.

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  23. I am a fan. A big fan. I am 33 years old but in the technological world I'm about 4, and for that reason I'm new to the blogging world. A friend sent me to mysuperhopeless... one day and I was hooked. I checked it several times a day. I was not upset about your 'coming out'. What I love is that it connected me to your real life blog.



    And for the last two days I have been one of the most unproductive employees I know. I have worked a little, and read your blog a lot. Pathetic as it might be I am now caught up. I have read every one of your posts. I have laughed out loud, and shed a few tears.

    Thanks...for some great stories and some good life lessons.

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  24. I had the crush that I thought had to happened...maybe not to the extend of visiting my bishop - BUT I KNOW THOSE SAME FEELINGS!! Its most likely mutual that its TEN TIMES BETTER BEING MARRIED TO SOMEONE WHO LOVES YOU BACK!! I'M TOTALLY FOR IT.

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  25. Yeah, my hopeless crush gave me the look (the one I'd been waiting for all those wasted months) during our mutual friend's wedding reception--while I was holding my first baby on one hip and my true love's hand. Good timing there, Mister.

    And may I just say that I thought gopher was sweet and charming. And I sighed over him fairly regularly. Love Boat was grand. But truly I blame love songs (not Love Boat) for encouraging me to be such a sap. Honestly, I didn't need much encouragement.

    By the way, good to see you back in the saddle again. Post away!

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  26. I THINK... At least your fictional blog wasnt about a "sad cause" who need us to help by donating our money. All we invested was time..

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  27. Sue--we love you. We love your honesty and your humor and your way with words. We love your enthusiasm for life and for love and how you experience everything right down to your toes. Stop being embarrassed about it and start realizing that it's why we love you and it's okay for you to feel just fine about being you.

    There are a lot of people out there who refuse to even be themselves on their own personal blogs. It takes COURAGE to put yourself out there. And as for the people who are disappointed that you're not in some unrequited (and then requited) passion play unfolding before their eyes, I say: you read blogs for entertainment. You were entertained. Get over yourself.

    XOX, Barb

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  28. Some people are so silly...

    I say to them... GET A SENSE OF HUMOR! From what I've seen, that's the whole point of blogging.

    Duh.

    Obviously, the joke was on us... and they just can't take it! (They wouldn't last 2 seconds in my family..)

    Keep it up... the rest of us will keep on laughing!

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  29. I was more of the secretive crush type. I'm pretty sure I can name just about every crush from kindergarten to college and until I was 20 NONE of them turned into anything at all.

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  30. *GASP*! That is my friend's story to a T! Even the bishop part! Although I think she met him in his office instead of his home, but still. I told her to dump his butt several times. Finally did. Then he married some other chick.

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  31. Um. So. . . . do Cordy and Seth end up together or what? You can't just leave it at an almost-kiss with her obvious true love and not give us the happily-ever-after ending.

    So publish. I'll totally read it.

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  32. I like your real blog tons better than the Cordy blog (though I will not deny checking up on Cordy rather frequently -- frequently being two to three times a day ...) But I'm trying to be better about not being a blog stalker so this is my first step to reformation.
    Thanks!

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  33. I thought Gopher was so cute, too! Is there a group to recover from that?

    Sue, you are insane...maybe that's part of why you are so funny.

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  34. What I'm really angry about is that now you have forced me to add another blog to my very long list of blogs to read. The sheer amount of time that I will now have to spend reading every single one of the Cordy posts is just infuriating. I mean, really! What were you thinking, trying to entertain the masses?

    HA!

    Oh Sue. You crack me up. I too was a chronic crusher, and I too always selected entirely impossible objects upon which to crush. Which almost made me miss out on ComputerDaddy, because hey, he actually liked me! Weird. Must be something wrong with him. (Truth--I nearly broke up with him after a few weeks because I was really suspicious about this guy who paid attention to me, thought I was beautiful, and actually wanted spend time with me! What an idiot I was.)

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  35. A fake cancer patient blog - THAT would probably be bad and deserve all the backlash you're getting.

    A fake romance blog? -- not so much. But hey, I never read it until you linked to it yesterday, and I like to think I would have figured out it was you the second he asked her to "sing that song from Les Mis"....um, hi. That's SO you.

    But if I had been emotionally vested, I would probably be a little upset, mostly at myself. I guess it does make people trust blogs a little less than they did before, but honestly, trusting blogs implicitly is not the best way to live your life.

    Sue's real, though, right? You exist??

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  36. Haha, I love the Harry Potter reference.
    Welcome back!

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  37. How is it that when you write, I totally know what you mean/feel, but I'm not capable of writing nearly as well?
    And seriously, so what if you have to convince them to love you? At least you're loved? Right? ....right?
    JK

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  38. Hahaha. I'm picturing the whole scene with the bishop. That's hilarious. My dad was a Bishop of a BYU singles ward for years and years. I answered many a phone call where the caller was sobbing and asking to please speak with Bishop Thomas. It was just our way of life for a while in there. That, and phone calls at 2:00 a.m. which resulted in Dad running out the door while tying his tie.

    I think that at this point, you could easily write a book. You now have the greatest topic: a woman who starts a blog under a false name about fictional scenarios, and what happens when the truth is revealed! Hey, I'd buy it. :-D

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  39. I blame my crazy infatuated crushes on Disney and their dang princesses. Oh yeah, Pride and Prejudice too. Now, things turned out fine, just like this whole blog thing will.

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  40. Hey... whatter you doing posting about this stuff on THIS blog? Where's mah MSHR fix? You've got some fluff to write young lady!

    And by the by... don't keep the day job, get yourself an agent already!

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  41. You suck in a basically civil way.

    Sorry, couldn't resist. I am apathetic, enjoyed reading the other blog but have no real feelings either way about the fact you made it up.

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  42. I got a comment troll but it was the American Folder Company.

    And I loved Doc on Love Boat so I don't know what that means.

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  43. One of my BFFs in junior high had a mom who didn't like me because I was way too boy-crazy. I had so many crushes that even reading through my old diaries, I can't keep them all straight.

    P.S.
    I just wanted to say that I loved every heart-wrenching minute of MSHR and I'm glad you wrote it, fiction or non-fiction.

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  44. I've written a letter like that (but he was my boyfriend of over a year who wouldn't move on to the next step, not just a friend)...but my prince charming didn't write me back. In fact he never spoke to me again...until a month before I was supposed to be married, he called and asked why I didn't wait for him. I was quite upset...because until the man I was engaged to he was the LOVE of my life. I was seriously depressed waiting day after day for him to respond...like majorly depressed. I don't remember what I said on the phone but I married the guy I was engaged to and have never been happier! Prince Charming is going on 30 and still has commitment issues. I think I dodged a bullet.

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  45. and I don't know what you've decided but I think you should finish cordy's story. I have to know what happens!

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  46. I grew up watching Love Boat too. What was my mum thinking? I was like, seven or something. Totally messed with my head too.

    I was never happy unless I had someone to crush on, so when there wasn't someone really spiffy on the horizon I picked someone not so spiffy and PERSUADED myself to have a crush on them. Because hey, otherwise? Life was not worth living.

    I'm glad I'm not the only head case out there. It's comforting.

    And people who send hate mail are haters. Which makes me feel really sorry for them. How crappy must their lives be that they got that upset something like that. Oi.

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  47. LOL ... I don't know why but I laughed and laughed. lol I think it was the mental picture you were painting for me. lol I pictured this crazed young woman with hair all a mess and mascara running around her eyes (giving the dreaded raccoon eyes.. lol) maybe even braces! lol Nah, that's making you look a little too deranged. lol Seriously, I think you're awesome. Thanks for the laugh, I totally needed it after this blog of a nut-job I just came across. lol (and not you. Some weirdo who left the church and now thinks he's on a different mission to save the world of Mormons. Burn dude. Burn.) lol So yeah, thanks for making me laugh. :)

    (And please tell me what happens next? lol Cause ya left me hangin. lol Did he get a restraining order? Move away? LOL I keed, I keed... lol)

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  48. Sue, I'm a truth-stretcher, madly-in-crusher too (to this day. Don't tell my husband.)

    Consider yourself fortunate. Most of my crushes didn't know I existed, let alone actually reject me.

    Don't feel bad about the fake blog thing. People are just upset because they realized what utter fools they truly are. And how it's preserved forever on the internet.

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  49. Sue- you totally rock. Don't let some crazies out there bug you. I love the things you write and the way you write. It allows me to escape from my own little insanity and jump into your's. YOU ROCK!

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  50. That blog is so incredibly true - every single girl has been there. And I understand why you felt you needed to end it. But I want to know the ending...! What happened to happily-ever-after? Forget these modern romances where everything is left to your own interpretation. SPELL IT OUT! Anyway, thought I'd say that I love your writing. And the Super Hopeless Romance was hilarious.

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  51. No restraining order - we were good friends and stayed good friends - went to each other's wedding reception. It was just a rough patch. :>

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  52. sorry Sue, this comment isn't going to be funny (I usually try to go the funny route), but I just gotta say I've been worrying that people are ripping you apart for the last couple days!

    For those people: if you want to take the route that "She LIED to me, I feel so stupid, I can't believe she LIED!!" Look at it this way, she told the truth (which would be ridiculously hard), she apologized, and she's trying to make it right. Its not our job to judge her, its your job to forgive her! If you want to take the churchy road about how we're supposed to be honest in our dealings, etc. way,she "repented". She went back to you and asked for forgiveness. Now forgive her. And if you've never lied to someone or done something wrong, then man you must be so perfect! How lucky for you!

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  53. I agree...too much "Love Boat". I had the same problem. I definitely had a true love crush every year until finally Heavenly Father got so tired of them he sent me a husband. :) A sucky husband...but...it ended the crushes for a while. :) Current husband finally ended all crushing forever.

    I was, of course, so hopeless that I couldn't be friends with boys because I was sure that if I was friendly they would fall in love and then I would have to struggle with the whole chastity thing. So I didn't talk to any boys until I was a senior in high school. Seriously. That's hopeless!

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  54. i love comment moderation. i love the feeling of power i get everytime i hit REJECT.

    i don't think you are a bad person for writing your fake-blog. it was entertaining as hell i loved every minute of it.

    AND it didn't get any less entertaining once i found out it wasn't real.

    you're a good person. people like you.

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  55. You are hilaaarious. And yes, I was a boy stalker too, but in high school. Good times.

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  56. Hahaha!!! I was the same way! Every time you write, I love you more and more. Happy Halloween.

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  57. I sent a couple of boys those "I'm so completely in love with you why won't you just consider me?" letters. Yes, I did it more than once.
    I didn't marry either one of them of course.

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  58. Sweet, I was hoping we'd get at least a snippet of your own personal super hopeless romance. :)

    I, too, was a ridiculously boy crazy chick. Reading my old journals makes me ill. As does the memory of how very quickly I would convince myself I was madly in love with JUST ABOUT EVERYONE. I consider the fact that I married an awesome guy pure luck. And a little bit o' divine intervention.

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  59. You know, I wish, at that age, that I had had enough self-esteem to even imagine that anyone would ever fall in love with me. I mean, I didn't even think it possible. So you, albeit insane, were still one step ahead of me.

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  60. Brilly referred me to your love blog the other day.

    Pretty much the second the title and blog design came up I figured it was fake and didn't bother to read any of it.

    I just wanted to say that it was very brave of you to own to the truth.

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  61. *snort* GOPHER???? Seriously? hehehe.

    BTW, loved the Twilight spoof so much I had to show my family. My brother says it looks more interesting than the real one. lol

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  62. OH, and I never read the "other" blog, but my stars, people have done worse things in life. Hang in there.

    And *everyone* has unrequited love experiences, and I'm sure most girls at some point have had some relationship like yours where they loved their best friend and were shot down. Repeatedly. Although I do have to agree with you on it being horrid to be a bishop of a singles ward ... oh the angst ...

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  63. So true, so true :) The freaky thing with social sites like Facebook, etc. is that some of those people come back to haunt you.

    Hey, you need to email me your address for the Abinadi book:
    heather at hbmoore dot com

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  64. I say go for the cancer one too. Why not?!

    You're my hero and I'm so sorry that you've gotten so much grief about it.

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  65. hahahahahahaha OK, this post finally brought me out of the lurking closet, my friend. This is about Kendell, right?

    Someday you will have to tell the whole story. I'm sure you could make it hilarious. Write a book about it. Or a fake blog. oh wait you already did hahahahahahahaha

    Good times, good times. The good old apartment days. We need to have a reunion. Remember Tony? Hahahahahahahahaha

    call me

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  66. Too bad you didn't have a blog back then, people would have loved it...

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  67. Gopher WAS so fine! He's actually on the radio now...I get to listen to him all the time. He's a really funny guy, and they give him a little bit of a hard time now and then about Love Boat.

    Anyway, your story made me laugh...sorry to have taken pleasure in that, but it's funny what young "love" will do to a person.

    And definitely keep Cordy going...I LOVED it.

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  68. Anonymous7:19 AM

    let he who has never known a pickle cast the first stone.

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  69. You are fabulous. You are honest...we've all done these crazy things for boys. Haven't we? Crap. Well, I have.
    And it's great to read someone else admitting it!
    Ignore the trolls...they have nothing better to do...)

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  70. THank you SO much for sharing that hilarious tale. We've all been there...well, sorta!

    And the post title has me singing The LOOOOOOOVE Boat song way too loud in my head...

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  71. I came to your blog "post drama" (after everyone freaked out). I don't understand what the big deal is. People are spending WAY to much time and energy on this. They should take it for what it was, entertaiment. Don't beat yourself up. You are a talented writer and should really consider publishing your stuff.

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  72. I agree, those poor bishops. My dad was in a bishopric once for a Young Singles ward and he could write a whole novel about the drama that was everyone's life.
    I hope you left up the romance blog because I only read one entry. I figured you were the perfect person to console her, and didn't make it back. Now I'll have to go read the whole thing. I agree with the nice people here. You meant no harm and fessed up. I can understand some people who were invested in it feeling betrayed initially, but I hope they eventually get it. Now if Mavel Gazing turned out to all be fiction, that would be just pathetic. Ya know? As long as it's like about 90% true-ish I think you're ok.

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  73. I'm not going to lie, I was completely shocked when I found out that you were writing the Cordy blog--there was a definite wide-eyed "No way!" moment. I'll admit, when you described how you orchestrated it all, well, I was pretty impressed.
    I just want to say that I enjoyed reading it and I will continue to do so as you finish the story. Honestly, who cares if it's actually real or not? It may as well be--I think almost all of us have gone through something like that (sometimes more than once).
    I cannot understand why people are reacting so poorly and I'm glad you're not taking the hate email too harshly.

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  74. If I was gonna make up stuff about my life, it would probably be stuff that was far less embarrassing. Besides, all of my family that read this blog keep me honest :>

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  75. I was a 'crusher' too- I had crushes on several people at once from 3rd grade all the way through high school...then I met my hubby the 3rd week of my freshman year of college & I've been crushing on him for 9 years. :)

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  76. Hahahahaha! I love love LOVE that to the Bishop. Oh, that just made my day! I think we were ALL just a teensy bit nutso back in the dating years. I am just too afraid to share my stories on my blog b/c my family reads it! LOL!

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  77. Oh, I feel your insanity. I was totally in love with a guy from my youth group for about 5 years. sigh. I was never brave enough to tell him, but one of my friends decided to break the ice for me and told him to invite me to his prom (he was a year older) because I liked him. HA! He never spoke to me again. And I do mean never.

    His wife was even forbidden to speak to me. :( But now he`s prematurely balding and totally looks old, so it`s all good in the end. lol.

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  78. sue. don't you worry about the angry people. the story was so delightful i check the site like five times a day hoping there will be a new post (even though i have updates on good reader).

    i love it. and i recommend it to all my friends and family.

    also, i love your crush story. my sisters and i are so ridiculous. just last night, i made some poor guy ask me out. i mean seriously, what is going through my brain?

    thanks. for being real.

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  79. I loved the whole story...and I'm hoping you'll finish it so Cordy can have a happy ending! ;-)

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  80. A short version of my hopeless romance:

    I'd had a years-long crush on this guy, and he finally asked me out, but after just a couple of dates, he told me he thought we should just be casual friends and be really comfortable talking and being open with each other before we tried to take things any further. He said he'd had a relationship where there was physical attraction but no openness or compatibility, which hadn't been a good thing. It was painfully true that I was never very open with him; was in fact far more tongue-tied and awkward than with any of the guys I wasn't interested in, because I was SO afraid of losing my chance with him. I hadn't even dared to call him an idiot when he'd told me he'd voted for Bill Clinton. Anyway, I took his little "just friends" speech as a complete rejection, and went home and wept bitterly. (BITTERLY; sobbed and sobbed.) And then I put on my woman-of-steel, he's-just-not-that-into-you face and never called him or tried to flirt with him ever, ever again. He even offered to drive me home from a ward activity a couple of months later, and I accepted the ride but mostly just kept quiet on the way home or made light small talk. And that was all.

    It's probably for the best because we probably weren't really very compatible (I mean, he voted for Bill Clinton, y'know?) WAIT, that came out wrong, I'm supposed to say it was ABSOLUTELY for the best because it left me available to meet and marry my fabulous husband. But, all these years later, I can't help but wonder if he really meant he wanted to make out with me, but sensed that I wasn't being very forthright with him and was trying to be decent and build a real relationship, and I really, really wish I'd at least asked for more clarification. My husband really is a MUCH better match for me, but it's just the unresolved mystery of it that still drives me nuts sometimes.

    (I know that might not have seemed like a short version -- but at least I left out the backstory.)

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  81. PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE finish your Cordy story!!! I don't have time to read or watch a good movie, but I can read Cordy's blog. :-) Fiction or nonfiction, I am enjoying it! Escapism at its finest!

    PS--Please keep writing her story!

    PPS--Please!!! (And I really hope Seth is the ONE) Am I pathetic?

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  82. I wanted to leave you a comment on the last post (did you ever see the day when you would voluntarily shut down your drug supply?) and say I don't know the site or, thus, the controversy. But clearly, you are a writer of talent and merit, Sue. A book is in your future.

    (I got that in my fortune cookie tonight, but clearly, it was meant for you.)

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  83. free will is for suckers... oh i love it! i definitely have to commend you on your integrity, i would have sheepishly shut down the other blog and not said anything to anyone about anything,.

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  84. I'm worried your story means that Cordy & Seth AREN'T going to end up together.

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  85. I found your blog completely by accident. I was trolling around looking for "I Hate Twilight" blogs so I could vent in good company. And voila, I ended up here and you are LDS which I consider a bonus because it means I can read your blog without fear of obscenity...or obscenities?...err... obsceneness? Whatever. You are completely crazy and I love that in a blogger. I don't know why people are gettin' all up in your kool aid.

    People don't realise how hilarious LDS women can be. Stephenie Meyer helped in that regard but since people obviously didn't get her spoof, it's good that you jumped in there to help the good work along.

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  86. You don't have to publish this, but OH MY GOSH! Cordy's new post is perfectly perfect! I love how you worked it all in! Every single little detail is masterful! Can you tell I am excited!?! I really do think it needs to be a book, you have such a great way of telling her story, I mean look how creatively you started it up again. Thanks so much for not stopping! (I was never REALLY mad! LOL! and now I am happy as a clam...not sure what that means, but yeah)

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  87. LOL, R Max. Stephenie must be so frustrated to be so misunderstood.

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  88. I'm failing to see what the fuss is all about. I'm more interested in figuring out how the heck you get that much traffic in ONE MONTH without showing any nude pictures.

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  89. You're great.

    I bet it was the Love Boat bc I was totally boy crazy too & I lived off that show. That one & little House on the Prairie, which Laura was boy crazy too.

    I really enjoy reading what goes through your head bc I can totally relate.

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  90. Didn't all of us have those crushes in high school? I sure did. My biggest one was with a boy who wasn't great looking, but had the best personality ever. Everyone was attracted to him, male & female (keep that bit of info in your mind for later). We did everything in group form, but it was always the two of us together within the group. He was 3 years older. He took me to my senior ball. I was embedded into his family as if I shared the same DNA. I loved him. I loved his family. They loved me. He was such a gentleman. Always.

    When he moved to a distant town and I decided to resume my education, one of his good friends took me out to dinner to celebrate that decision since Rick wasn't there to do it. Over dinner, his friend and I were talking about Rick, and he said something to me that indicated that Rick was gay.

    What? The rest of the night, that statement echoed in my brain. I had no idea, but that explains why he was always a gentleman. How could he hide such a thing from me, the one who loved him so? I was crushed and angry.

    It took me a long while to confront him, and did so in the best way I knew how....via the U.S. Mail! He called me as soon as he got the letter, he drove up to see me. We went to a marina and sat there one evening at sundown, and talked and cried.

    I married and had a family, but he stayed in my life, always the best friend, my biggest cheer leading guy. I lost Rick about ten years ago to AIDS. I did not, however, lose his family. His sister is one of my closest friends.

    I lived with hope of marrying him for so long, then was so saddened when I knew he was never going to be mine. But I would never ever trade a second that I spent with him. They were the best of times.

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  91. I'm so glad you decided to continue the Cordy story...love it!

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  92. I've been following your Cordy blog and loving it. Now you should finish the story in novel form, or finish this story on line and publish lots of spin-off novels, submit them somewhere (or self publish), and earn a gazillion dollars. It looks like lots of people want to know how it all ends (including me). You obviously have found your audience and touched a familiar chord if you can elicit so much emotion pro and con from people who don't know you. You have no need to apologize for anything. That people believed this was real is evidence of your writing talent. Go SUE!

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  93. I LOVE it. I thought I was the only crazy girl in love with so many boys! I was organizing and found a box that contained my old journals from high school. I was soooo embarrassed after looking through them for an hour or so! Every page talked about one boy or another that I thought was so cute... and that he talked to me today... or looked at me... or you get the picture. I actually called my mom that afternoon and apologized for being such a freak back then! She just laughed!

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  94. Dude! I so love the hopeless romance story. You're making me remember my whole little "he looked at me" moments! And I'm on board with the plan to bring back the "do you like me, check yes or no" format. Makes things easier, you know where you stand. Don't let the silly people who believe everything they read on the interwebs get you down, it is a FAB story!

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  95. Oh how familiar it sounds! Yeah, I was a freak, too. I guess that's why I only attracted freaks for the longest time.

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  96. The Love Boat give me a headache. My mom used to put curlers in my hair while we watched that show... and they were too damn tight!

    I think Ponch from CHiP's is hot...

    You are amaxing--- that's amazing to the MAX!!

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  97. Ah, I can relate to you so much. I am so grateful that I am not the only one who thought Gopher was cute and not the only one who was ridiculously boy crazy and was never "loved" back - until I met my husband that is.

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  98. What WAS it about Gopher??? I'm with you on that crush... I mean Bo and Luke Duke were shoo-ins...plus Face from A-Team... and I did like Hawkeye from MASH...

    People need to get over themselves about the romance blog... please...

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  99. I didn't know about the Cordy blog, but I think I may go back and read it. From the bits I skimmed through, you could totally turn it into a blog book. Seriously. :) I'm glad you found your man :)

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  100. Anonymous9:15 AM

    Hey! It's October 2010 and I read the Cordy/Seth story without realizing it was fiction and I was only bothered that it didn't end. You write well! I hope you keep it up!

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