Monday, September 29, 2008

Whack Job

This weekend, I got my hair cut clean off. It's really short, but with some length on top. I kind of liked it, until I got home.

When I got there, Carter opened the door. He stared at me with an open mouth and said, "Mom, you look CRAZY."

I sort of laughed that off and came inside, then noticed Abby, who was giving me a look that I have not seen since high school - all full of contempt and scorn. She stared at me for a minute, then spat out, "You should not have done that," shook her head and stomped off up the stairs to the playroom.

Sarah was the worst, because I could tell she WANTED to be nice, but could not figure out what to say. She just stood there looking at me dubiously and saying, "Uhhhhhh..........." She eventually just turned around and went upstairs, because I think she realized no good could come of the conversation.

That left my poor husband. Once he stopped snickering over the children's responses, he told me he liked it. "It's nice."

Oh.

Great.

I mean, we all know that when you get a semi-drastic haircut, what you are really hoping for is for your significant other to tell you that it's "nice."

I was in a most excellent mood for the rest of the day. I had to restrain myself from passive aggressively muttering hair related things to the children - "Oh, YEAH Sarah, well at least I didn't try to cut my own BANGS."

The worst was later, when the children came in to my room where I was sulking checking my email, to tell me what they REALLY thought of my hair (now that they'd been coached by my husband). (Nice try honey.)

Sarah: "I like it. It looks nice."
Me: "You don't have to say that."
Sarah: "It's what I really think."
Abby: (continues to stare at me with disgust)
Sarah: "I love you mom. AND your hair."
Me: (looking at my husband) "Stop making them do this."
Carter: "Whack a whack a whack. They WHACKED you Mom. WHACK A WHACK."

I thought it looked o.k., but APPARENTLY I WAS WRONG.

110 comments:

  1. the comment i hate the most is, "well, do you like it?" nothing worse than hair comments!

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  2. I had a similar experience this weekend. I told myself it's just that my kids don't like change.

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  3. Ah, come on. At least show us a celebrity hair look alike!

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  4. and don't you hate it when people tell you to "just give it a couple weeks"?

    hello?! a couple weeks of what? embarrassment, etc?

    sorry about your hair issues. not fun. not fun at all.

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  5. We've all been through this at least once, haven't we? I bet the change was just hard for the family. Can't wait to see pictures!

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  6. i too had a similar experience on thurs which is why for the next two months (approximately how long i estimate that my hair will take to grow out) my blog will only feature "mupppet babies"-style photos. you know, the ones where the adults are only shown from the shoulders down.

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  7. I can always tell when my husband doesn't like something because he PAUSES. There is that split second of hesitation that tells me that he's trying to think of something nice to say. It's enough to send me running off to the bathroom to hide for the next month and a half. LOL

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  8. What are you going to do? We all know a woman's hair is her crowning glory. Too bad for you. JK, been there, done that, cried for a week and then got a fixer cut. Since I don't know you in real life, I wouldn't even laugh if you did post a pic. hint hint

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  9. Oh, I just got my hair cut and I hated it as soon as I left the salon. But mine was the opposite, everyone else liked it. After I washed it and styled it myself I found it wasn't that bad.

    Maybe in a day or two it will feel/look better.

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  10. I am so sorry. But at least none of the children ran away screaming in terror, right?

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  11. Anonymous11:17 AM

    I feel your pain. Once I got my hair cut and it had gotten long and heavy and I got it short, and the stylist blew it dry with one of those diffusion things so it was afro curly. I walked home and met the family in a park. The kids all started LAUGHING!! Donn, ever helpful, said, "You look like a clown!"
    I went home and wet it down and it looked better, and of course it grew out, but they still remember that and bring it up, sometimes, 5 years later now. Sigh...
    But honestly, I bet yours is cute. I mean, what do kids know about style? Matching kool-aid stains? That's about it.

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  12. I'm sure it looks awesome. Sometimes kids just aren't great with change. :)

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  13. Anonymous11:25 AM

    At least they noticed! I've gotten haircuts where nobody said anything. Not a word. And it was a drastic haircut too.

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  14. Your problem is that you didn't go drastic ENOUGH often ENOUGH!

    That or I really DO look hot with hot pink streaks in my hair.

    Or possibly my kids have no taste.

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  15. Well, I didn't get an up close look because my binoculars are broken but from a distance I think it looks great. But you couldn't look anything but great Sue, never ever ever.

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  16. Yeah, whenever I get my hari TRIMMED and RE dyed. my kids look at me funny. Please don't use them as a gauge! :) They are, after all, just kids. At least wear it to church or something before you completly write it off! :)

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  17. Bummer about the hair, but hey it will grow back eventually. I once let my SIL cut and die my hair. I ended up with a blonde/gold bob. When I left her salon, I thought, WOW, what a change. And I kind of liked it. But when I got home my husband said it looked like hooker hair! Worse of all my SIL did it and I didn't want to make her feel bad so I didn't change the color for 6 weeks!

    p.s. I don't let her do my hair anymore... gee I wonder why...

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  18. so i'm coming to utah on thursday for my mission reunion, want me to bring my scissors? We can either work on your cut, or sneak into the kids room in the night and cut their hair and see how they like the comments.

    The comment that ticked me off the worse, I was pregnant with my first and I cut it short and a little punk rock with an edgy color, my "friend" said, well you're not a mom yet.
    I'm a stylist, and being a mom shouldn't make you boring. I will always have fun hair. Saturday it was all I could do not to color my hair purple and pink with my manager.

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  19. I'm so sorry! A bad haircut is one of my biggest fears. Well, as far as mostly inconsequential fears go, maybe the biggest. I even started up a blog for people to submit information on good hairstylists, hoping to save other women from the shame of a bad haircut. It's still up, but it didn't get the incredible response I was hoping for, so I haven't updated it for a while. And I don't mean to presume that your stylist is bad... do I?

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  20. Anonymous12:04 PM

    It is NOT a bad haircut. It's very cute, and the color is great. You've had your hair like this before, and I always like this cut on you. I'm convinced that kids, particularly little girls, just don't like short hair. Don't go by them.

    Call me, by the way. Yes, don't email me - call me. I'm serious.

    Debbie

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  21. i am sure it looks great, kids just don't respond to change very easily. :)

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  22. Give it a few days. You need to get used to it, and apparently, so do they. But I bet it looks great. Maybe I should come over and be an objective third party. If it's really that bad, at least soon it'll be cool enough to wear cute hats for awhile until it grows out a bit.

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  23. I got a haircut earlier this year, a dramatic hair cut and no one said a thing... which of course means that it was terrible and they were all thinking "urgh thats ugly" but not saying it because my friends are very nice people. SO The second I had another chance I went and got it fixed... THEN people said "oh. You cut your hair! Its so cute!" -Like they didn't notice the first one.

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  24. It's darling! And you have the world's bluest eyes!

    You're right. "It's nice" is not what you want to hear. From anyone.

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  25. Mary, you are cracking me up. CRACKING. ME. UP. (See, I broke out the periods.)

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  26. I think you look great! Maybe the kids just don't want mommy to "change".

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  27. I had a similar experience last week.

    My new do was met with an eerie silence.

    Sigh.

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  28. Totally relate to the hair cut trauma. That's why I've had the same stylist for years. But I usually am not thrilled with the way she styles it. She always does a great cut, though.

    Oh, and I guess that wasn't you that I saw in the R. S. broadcast choir on Saturday. That lady's hair was more like the cut in your header picture.

    Bet you look great with your new look.

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  29. Your hair looks great. At least they noticed, right? And I agree with earlier comments, children and husbands are not the best judges. :)

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  30. Hate it when that happens! I just turned on Beck's 'Devil's Haircut' in your honor, although I do like your new do.

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  31. i'm glad i'm not the only person who is so over the top critical of herself!!! the new profile pic is adorable. i was expecting BOY short hair, like BUTCH style short...it looks CUTE and trendy! be nice to you!

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  32. Sue, you look thinner in your new photo than you do in your header!

    When I got short haircut a few years, I went to my husband's office to show him. He didn't say a word, he just shoved me out and slammed the door.

    Way to make a girl feel good.

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  33. Anonymous1:04 PM

    Definitely like the new cut. It's a lot trendier than the header pic, and very cute. :D

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  34. Anonymous1:23 PM

    Ok.... Your hair is awesome! I love love love short hair! It looks great! I can't believe they didn't like it. But, honestly, my hubby hates it everytime I get a cut. I'm just sorta used to it now and don't care. After all, he's not gonna divorce me over HAIR!

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  35. I like the "I could never pull it off but it looks good on you" statements...it's like what are you trying to say? Are you above my haircut?

    But I like it Sue! :)

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  36. I like the haircut. I think you look really cute. Your kids just don't know haute fashion when they see it. :)

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  37. The "nice" comment is better than "It looks like a brillo pad" or "You look like you have a fox butt on the back of your head"

    Yes two real comments that came out of the mouth of my husband.

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  38. In my newlywed year, I tried to be "frugal" and back off the highlights and go natural. Since awful roots resulted, I decided to go get my hair dyed to its natural color. If I were the suing type....

    Apparently the salon had just been trained on a new product line just hours before my arrival and I was customer #1 to see how it worked. The damage was considerable enough that many inches had to be removed. I went from being a long, blonde-haired bride to a wretched hollow shell of shame with short, asian-black hair. When I returned to our apartment, my husband stared at me and instinctively knew to get up and give me a hug. If only he hadn't said, "It's like getting a whole new wife." Ugh.

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  39. SHUT UP, it's so cute and I'm not just saying that to say it to you fancy blog lady I really do like it and I don't lie like some other people but I do ramble on with no punctuation because I really really like the hair!

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  40. I think it's CUTE!! And I think you look younger there than in the header picture. And definately NOT fatter. With beautiful eyes!

    Seriously, though, I *really* like it. I had an "incident" recently where I dyed my hair and instead of going blonder, it turned dark auburn!!! My kids are too young to react, but hubby was NOT impressed. It's still not the color I want, but anyway...

    I really do like your hair. If YOU think it's cute, then it probably is. The people closest to you aren't very good judges. I'd love to see that little face on my blog. Definately not as creepy as the stalkerish shadow.

    And Mary Poppins - I'm jealous that you're happier with your body below the neck than above. What would that be like.....

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  41. I'm so not just saying this to make you feel better. It's so cute! I want short hair now.

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  42. In my previous comment I assumed it was a bad cut. But I just saw the picture and I think it's really cute!

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  43. I did some student teaching in a middle school, and all the kids would just sit there, daring me to teach them something with a look on their faces that said, "you are soooo uncool". I always thought, "how cool could you be? You can't even drive!"

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  44. Anonymous2:21 PM

    I think it's cute! I have no idea how old you are, but I think you look younger in that pic than your header pic. (Don't twist that around- it's a compliment.) You look fun and hip!

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  45. It is cute! And the description is even cuter! You are too funny.

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  46. It looks totally fine. Good, even.

    Seriously.

    One time my friend went to supercuts and come home with an actual mullet.

    If ever I get stressed about hair, I think about that mullet.

    Can you sue somebody for giving you a mullet you didn't want? Is sort of like vandalism.

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  47. I thought after reading your post that it would be scary, but it's really super cute. (At least from the front.) I just have to tell you... you say all the things I am thinking in my own life but am not brave enough to post on my blog. You R awesome.

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  48. Anonymous2:53 PM

    I like the hair. Makes you look young.

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  49. I think you look nice. I don't think you look fat, either. Of course, I'm some random person you never met on the internet (although I "follow" you, so I'm not totally random), so you probably won't listen to me, but I try.

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  50. It looks adorable. And really, it is the most important thing, do you like it?

    Cause I do. Just so you know.

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  51. Earlier this summer, I straightened my hair and drastically lightened it. Husband's response? "It feels like I'm cheating on you with another woman." Ummm...is that a good thing?

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  52. Anonymous4:01 PM

    I think it looks nice! :) No really...I do. It is a good length.

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  53. I think it looks great! Not just anyone can pull off a short cut - I really love it (and I am not kissing up either).

    When my husband had lasik surgery my son freaked out and told him to put his glasses on - that he wasn't his dad without glasses. Kids just get used to how we look and change freaks 'em out.

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  54. Anonymous4:11 PM

    Hey - I really DO like it. Of course, considering that I have my choice of a) no hair b) wig #1 or c) wig #2... I'm probably just jealous.

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  55. Hm. Well, my husband is perfect in all ways except for the part where he never notices when I get my hair colored. Perhaps my mistake was in not chopping it all off. But every time I consider it, he says, "Oh, you'll look just like your sister," with a really innocent smile and then that's the end of that.

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  56. I too have daughters with better style sense than I possess. How does that happen? Is it, like, some sort of genetic mutation?

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  57. Anonymous4:55 PM

    It looks cute! I do know though that children typically have a harder time adjusting to their parent's hair cuts. Once my husband cut his hair and his kids cried!

    So, don't be so hard on yourself, it looks good. I do know what you're feeling though. My best friend cuts my hair (college budget won't allow for an actual salon visit) and sometimes it's REALLY shorter than I had wanted. But, beggars can't be choosers. Not that you're a beggar, just saying I am. :)

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  58. Oh shush! It's great!

    I too sometimes doubt my haircuts...but sometimes I do really crazy things like get a chili bowl but keeping my sideburns long BUT only on ONE side. Then I get a little nervous...so I dye the sideburn thing blonde and you can barely tell.

    See, people do much sillier things with their hair that turn out much worse than yours. Not to say that yours turned out bad...that's not what I'm saying! :P

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  59. Oooh! I love it. You are braver than I. I am going through a long hair phase and need a change. Thanks for your bravery.

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  60. Well, I think it looks really great. And I'm jealous, because my dh would absolutely DIE if I cut mine and I'm dying for a really drastic change. Why do men (and children, too, apparently) not understand a woman's need for the occasional change?

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  61. I think it's darling!
    (I'm a short hair crazy..always always always chopping it ALL the way off. So...that actually looks kind of long to me. If you don't like it - it'll grow really really fast - but you should like it. Because it really does look cute. Plus you look NOT A DAY over twenty. so. There's that.)

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  62. I think that it looks great! Very modern! You kids don't know what they are talking about!

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  63. YOUR HAIR LOOKS AWESOME. Your kids and husband have not sense of style.

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  64. I'm sorry that happened! Sigh... my husband always used to use the line "it's interesting" to describe things he didn't like.

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  65. This was hysterical, probably because I have been there. If you get time, read my experience, The Haircut From Hell. Go to jen-rantsraves.blogspot.com/2008/04/haircut-from-hell.html
    I'm still trying to grow out my bangs, and recover my self esteem!

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  66. At least you have enough hair for them to cut. My hair girl kept saying, "Gee, it's so thin, I hope I don't cut it all off..."

    Comforting. Yeah.

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  67. Anonymous6:32 PM

    Very funny post! My kids never seem to warm up to my attempts to change my appearance...at least the first day. I really like your hair. MIME

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  68. I think you look great! The hair and you are adorable!

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  69. I am not kidding. I LIKE it. Your eyes look HUGE and soo, sooooo blue. It highlights your cheekbones. Your kids are dorks, they don't know a good haircut when they see it. Honest, I promise I am not trying to make you feel better. If I hated it, I would have said, it is okay, hair grows pretty fast. But I didn't say that.

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  70. Well I think it is adorable. I have an appointment tomorrow and I was wavering whether or not to WHACK it and I decided tonight to DO it!

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  71. Anonymous7:39 PM

    I think it looks fine! Your family is just used to seeing you one way, that`s all.

    When I was 18, I shaved my head (after having waist length hair) and yesterday, my toddlers found the photos. My 16 month old laughed his head off, pointing at my hair and then staring at the picture. So, I think, if a 16 month old can laugh about a haircut . . . you really have no hope once they get older!

    BTW, my older son, 2.5, just looked at it and said, "Why you have no hair, Mama?"

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  72. Anonymous7:40 PM

    What are they talking about!

    YOU LOOK BEAUTIFUL!

    DANG GIRL!

    Freak!

    Seriously!

    I really really like it.

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  73. Anonymous7:42 PM

    Oh my gosh I still can't get over your picture. Your eyes are amazing! you just look so freaking cute!

    okay I'm done. sometimes I get a little hyper when I eat a pan of rice krispy treats by myself.

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  74. come on, you're beautiful! Really!

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  75. Ok, I love your hair. it's SPUNKY. Kids just don't understand spunky... they tend to think it looks CRAZY :) Especially if they aren't used to it.

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  76. Anonymous8:45 PM

    For a girl who had almost no hair for the first five years of your life, it always amazes me that you have ended up with the best head of hair in the family. Whether it is short or long, it always looks great. And now I would have to add that you have the bluest eyes of the bunch.

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  77. I love your haircut! And I don't know you at all, so no reason to lie or say nice things for your husband!

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  78. Wow, it looks great! It actually is really adorable.

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  79. My husband would like you all to stop now. He thinks I'm getting way too conceited.

    I don't know what he's talking about. I think it's perfectly normal to casually mention in conversation that 9 out of 10 blog readers really like my hair. :>

    Seriously, you all are so kind, I'm really touched.

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  80. I'm on day three of NO COMMENTS at all! I colored and chopped it, and no comments? Am I invisible?

    I LOVE yours, Sue! It's dang cute--wear it proud!

    I need to figure out photoshop. That'd be so cool to nip off some face fat.

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  81. My kids are equally tactful. Lovely, isn't it?

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  82. I love your hair! It brings out those beautiful blue eyes! Really! It just looks different than they are used to. I remember when I was little my mom's hair dresser liked to experiment on her. Once she glued these really long eyelashes on her--they were supposed to last weeks! They were hideous! She took them off that night. Then another time she "frosted" her very dark brown hair with blond--remember those caps and crochet hooks? When she came home I was like Sarah--I smiled at her, couldn't say anything and the tears just rolled. It just wasn't my mom. Yeah, so she went back and had that fixed too. Kids are the best, aren't they?

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  83. PS I just gotta add--I have a bob that I grow out and cut off every 3 months. I get a good 3 inches off every time and my HUSBAND NEVER NOTICES!!! The kids think it is hilarious.

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  84. Too bad you are not posting pictures because I really want to know what the big deal is. I like short hair but men and younger kids I heard like the Disney princess long hair better. So maybe your new hair cut is awesome. Just not Disney-princessy.

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  85. A couple of weeks ago, I decided to change my hair color from blonde to red...Rene Russo red.

    But first, we took a detour through eggplant-ville, which was super fun for several days until my stylist could color strip my hair and do some other fancy stuff to make it get to the red I wanted to begin with. But for those days, my kids looked at me funny. A lot.

    You look fantastic!

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  86. I know what you mean! I drastically changed my hair- cut and color!- recently and worse than the not-so-genuine comments is the very loud SILENCE from people at church when you've done something so comment-worthy! :) Yours looks great, btw, you look 10 years younger!

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  87. I like it! (For what that's worth)

    When I WHACKED mine off last year my middle one stayed for the process and loved every second. More! Shorter! She would yell. When the other two got back from the park with Hubby, oldest took one look and started to cry. Youngest laughed so hard he fell on his bottom. It happened for the next two days. And Hubby? Took a giant swallow and asked if I was happy. Nice.

    But the church people love it so I'm ignoring my family. Wait on the church/blog test.

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  88. That hair cut is so cute. Go with your gut instinct; you look great.

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  89. First: I like your hair.
    Second: I won't be submitting because I can't think of anything funny enough.
    Last: I will purchase the book instead.

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  90. Anonymous9:51 AM

    I love it! I'd love to have my hair look like that and I'm not just saying that.

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  91. Okay, so today is the 30th.... um. I'll try and get something out to you for tonight, okeley dokely?
    My husband thinks that "you look nice." is high praise. I am going to forward him this post to explain WHY IT SUCKS.

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  92. I'm laughing so hard right now. I got a drastic hair cut in June, and my husband said nothing. NOTHING. Never brought it up once. What an ass, right?

    I actually think your hair cut looks cute and trendy. I'm imagining all the fun you can have with product! Work it!!

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  93. Oh brother! It looks FINE!! Don't give them any special treats, little ingrates!

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  94. I love the hair! It looks great. You seriously look like you're 23 years old.

    The coolest compliment I ever got was "It reminds me of Hayley Mills in the Parent Trap." Not the look I was going for, thankyouverymuch.

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  95. If it makes you feel any better, I chopped my hair and my daughter told me I look like a man. And I was ugly.

    What does she know?! She's five! I love it! She just might wake up with gum in her hair and we'll have to chop her's off! mwaa ha haa!

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  96. p.s. your hair looks FANTASTIC! my hair's shorter than that, so I can totally relate, but honest to goodness--FANTASTIC! :)

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  97. I love the haircut! I think it looks great. Your kids just need to learn about fashion.

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  98. Good luck with the blog book. Smiles!!

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  99. LOVE IT!! (And nobody told me to say it)

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  100. I think it's cute. You could have some fun with barrettes at that length too! Also, I think you look fabulous!

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  101. Anonymous10:21 PM

    It's cute. HONEST. Very young and fresh. And it makes you look EXACTLY 12 lbs thinner.

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  102. My mother used to get a drastic new 'do after every new kid. (There are 5 of us, starting with twins.) She started with a boy cut dyed (nearly) purple after us (the twins.)

    She ended up with a bob, just below her ears, permed...curly. She came home and my little brother, completely dead pan, said, "Mom, you look YUCKY."

    She didn't go to another professional stylist for 16 years.

    Umm...take whatever moral you like from that story. ;-) The haircut makes you look younger, though!

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  103. Anonymous11:15 PM

    I really do think it looks great.

    I got mine cut a little longer than chin length a few weeks ago (I've usually worn it longer than that,) and my eight-year-old daughter's first comment was "You look weird." My husband said it looked "nice." Because I'm mean, I had to pursue the question more later; this time he said, "It's not like people have just one haircut that looks good on them." Me: "Is that your diplomatic way of saying that although you like my hair long, you'll support me in however I want to wear it?" His reply: "Something like that."

    I have to give him full points for diplomacy (I'm always pushing for his opinions on my appearance and he always skirts the question tactfully) but of course I'd like it even better if he'd learn to lie a little and say "You look FABULOUS!" But then I guess he'd worry I wouldn't ever go back to long hair. Although I might not anyway -- I'm really happy with my easy-care cut.

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  104. Anonymous11:41 PM

    Jennie W. (back in the middle of the comments, whose husband pushed her out of his office and closed the door on her) I think your husband needs to take diplomacy lessons from my husband. (And then they both need to take my "How to talk to your wife like a male protagonist in a Jane Austen novel" course. Although my sister said she tried teaching her husband, and it didn't take.)

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  105. Even the best trained hubbies shold never be asked if our new haircut looks nice. They probably didn't even notice that our hair changed! {eyeroll} We still love 'em though, don't we? :)

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  106. Anonymous8:57 PM

    You know, the day after I posted my last comment I remembered that my four-year-old said "You look beautiful Mommy! I want to get my hair cut, too!" So I've been thinking I needed to come back and give credit where credit was due. (And, bonus, just days later her little brother did give her a haircut.)

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  107. Anonymous8:58 PM

    And also it was the next day when my mind suddenly figured out that "trublubyu (comment #4) isn't meant to say "trub lub yu."

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  108. My little one got freaked out when I tried on a ponytail at the mall. It's probably just because they're not used to it, no matter how good it looks. Picture! Picture!

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