Thursday, November 20, 2008

I Think If I Hear One More Word About the Twilight Movie, My Head Will Explode

Pin It I turn on the TV, there it is.

I pull up Google News, there it is.

It's in the paper, on the radio, on Facebook, even {sob} all over my Google Reader.

IT is EVERYWHERE.

Holy mother of a vampire.

MAKE IT STOP.


PS: Tired of junk mail? Try this. Mwa-ha-ha-ha (Hat tip to Tracy M.)

68 comments:

  1. I hear ya. Although, I have to admit: I am going to see the movie tomorrow. Sometimes a good movie can make up for bad writing :D.

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  2. SUE!!! Settle down! I would just like to bear my testimony that I know Edward Cullen is the finest man alive...well undead, anyway.
    For real, pumpkin. If you can't beat 'em...join 'em.
    ps thanks for stopping by! I wish I would have vacuumed or something. It was good to have you. Did you see the post where I linked to you and bragged you all up in my comments section?

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  3. I begrudge no-one the enjoyment of the movie. I'm just so, so, so, so sick of hearing about it. THERE IS NO ESCAPE.

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  4. I am wondering what all the buzz will be after opening day, how can a movie possibly live up to all this hype?

    Also, I have no ticket to said movie.

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  5. I haven't read the books.
    I'm not going to see the movie.

    I guess I'm just a party pooper.

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  6. Amen, amen, amen.

    Although I will be at the theater tomorrow.

    I'll just be seeing the Bond film.

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  7. Oh,and Amber's comment is hilarious.

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  8. Clearly I live under a rock. I rarely watch TV and I haven't even read Google News in a few days. How lucky I am.

    (I *have* encountered some Twilight stuff lately -- just not been inundated.)

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  9. I just got home from the midnight showing here in NC. It was hilarious. I don't think it was supposed to be, but dang . ..it made for some good laughs. You would laugh . . . a lot. I felt the same way about the book as you did. Go see it. Laugh. Post about it so we can all laugh again.

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  10. I'll second what Tanji said -- I just got back from the midnight show in GA and the whole theater was cracking up the whole time. Everyone I was with kept whispering, "Are we supposed to be laughing this much?"

    Sue, I am begging you, PLEASE go see it and then review it for us. We could all use another good laugh!

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  11. I just got back from the midnight showing also. I SWEAR I only went to go see all the other crazies. It was the most entertaining people watching night I have ever experienced. It was so worth the $10.50 and the staying up till 3 and sleeping on the couch all day tomorrow while my kids are glued to the TV. I haven't laughed this hard in a long time. Sue don't miss out!

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  12. Oh I'm so glad it's funny -- I just didn't get the whole "angst/melodrama" of the books, not to mention the characters' unhealthy relationship. Seriously.

    oh wait, that's not why i was going to comment.

    I heart the brick idea. I'm going to have to stop recycling boxes and paper products and start sending them to junk mailers.

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  13. I feel your pain.
    It was funny winding up my fellow classmates who love Twilight because in the end, I convinced many of them that it wasn't that great, but yesterday at my dance class, I was surrounded by and OHMYGODWHATDIDYOUJUSTSAYded by Twilight lovers when I said I couldn't believe they were making a film out of such a crap book.
    (There aren't any films for Elabeth Honey, Jellicoe Road, A Thousand Splendid Suns, but for Twilight? Probably because it's the most cliched chick flick of a book out there...)

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  14. It has been my experience that the bigger the ad campaign, the worse the movie. Or at least the greater the disappointment.

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  15. My cousin just posted an interesting review of the whole twilight phenomenon HERE. There's a lot to think about!

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  16. I agree with you totally!

    Oh and I LOVE the bulk mail bit. I think I might do that this weekend. I am sure I have few extra bricks around her some where, waaa haaa haaa!

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  17. I agree on the Twilight thing.

    It didn't even get good reviews.

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  18. Sue-you can come read my blog. There may be an over-abundance over Saved the Bell on there, but so far no Twilight info.

    It's safe. I promise:)

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  19. I agree.

    I saw adult women getting all hot and bothered while they were being interviewed on the news.

    I'm almost embarrassed for my gender!

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  20. I love the brick idea, only, I don't think I can get it through my computer. That's where most of the junk mail comes from. Which reminds me, one place where Twilight has been noticeably absent IS the mailbox. The snail mail kind, that is. Hmmmm, this response is really lame--it's way to early in the morning for me.

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  21. ***yawn*** Maybe I'll go see it when it hits the dollar theatre.

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  22. I couldn't agree more. Women at my book group last night all had their husbands reading the book thinking it would cure their marriages. One girl actually claimed it had healed her marriage...hmmm....

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  23. I am totally scared to even look at this book now. What if I turn out to be one of them? One of the vampire-romance-loving hordes?

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  24. Amen. It's for little girls and is going to be the worst movie ever. SO PLEASE STOP TALKING ABOUT IT!! I'll always be bitter that Twilight pushed back the release of Harry Potter's next movie.

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  25. And yet here you are, pushing it on me. I thought your blog was safe. GRRR >;[

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  26. Sue, methinks thou dost protest too loudly.

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  27. What, you mean you're not going to see it?

    I kid. :-)

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  28. I haven't read the series just yet so I can't match everyone's enthusiasm just yet. It does seem rather obsessive, doesn't it? ;)

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  29. Amen and amen. You said it so well, I linked here today.

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  30. Tell us how you really feel.

    The one thing I read that made me laugh and laugh was that when Edward stepped out into the sun, he looked like he had been attacked by a bunch of people with glitter spray and Bedazzlers. The effect kind of works in the book, but in the movie, it's more like a "human disco ball". That made me smile.

    I'll probably rent it.

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  31. I think my head is exploding. Getting out of Utah so I don't have to hear people discussing it on their cell phones in the store would help. I'm trying to read the last book to my daughter, but we are only on page 350 and I will be surprised if we mire our way through before she's off to college.

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  32. UGH with the Twilight already.

    And the junk mail thing? Awesome. I always take those subscription postcards from magazines and send them back blank because I'm already a subscriber. Yeesh. I'll have to try this mail-a-brick thing. Looks fun.

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  33. Hint: stop turning on the TV, radio, computer. Then you won't hear about it. That was my strategy for the presidential election coverage.

    Does anybody know who won?

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  34. Is there some kind of disciplinary action that the church of Edward is going to have to take against you?

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  35. I only ever get to watch Nick Jr around here so I haven't heard much about the movie... But I can't wait to see it the books were great!

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  36. Twilight didn't push back the Harry Potter movie, Liv. HP decided it was a bad time to release so they shot for next summer instead. As a result, Twilight jumped in and took its old release date.

    We're going to see the movie but we sure as heck aren't expecting much. Those previews were bad enough. Mostly it's just a GNO thing.

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  37. I have no where else to go to voice my TRUE feelings about Twilight, so I'm doing it here. I haven't laid one finger upon a vampire book, and never intend to. It is against my religion...or at least my principles. From what I've heard it's "light" reading, and I don't do that. If I'm going to invest my time (precious) and cash (even more precious - and scarce), I want to really gain something profound, not just cry (really?) or swoon (gag). Give me literature (not light reading) or give me death!

    That said, I am going to a Twilight party tonight! It is my last ditch effort to "fit in" amongst my very unfriendly neighbors/ward. I decided a few months ago that I would accept any and all invites. I didn't realize then what that would mean. I fear I will be biting my tongue to a bloody nub all night and won't be able to keep my eyes from rolling out of their natural orbit. At least I can come home and spend the rest of the wee hours gossiping about it to my husband.

    I just cannot get over the fact that this stuff was written as young adult fiction, and EVERY not-so-young adult woman I know is obsessed with it. I don't get it.

    Sorry to write my own blog post here, but you understand that I can't offend my friends by publishing it where they would see it, right?

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  38. Haha, I haven't seen it cause I haven't read it. But I *do* plan on reading it, eventually.
    And I am TOTALLY going to do that junk mail thing sometime, SOOOOO funny!

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  39. I send every credit card application back and include every scrap of paper that came with it. I also take permanent marker to the application, crossing out all the blank spaces and writing "Please take my name and address off your mailing lists." You would be amazed at the results.

    However, methinks the brick idea is absolutely brilliant.



    So......has your head essploded yet?

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  40. Commenting again --

    WHY is this such a polarizing issue? I don't understand, can't people who like Twilight and people who don't like it get along? It's not politics, it's not religion, it's a freakin' BOOK!

    I really don't get it, no other book that I know of seems to illicit such reactions. I mean, we were at book club last night and one gal had to leave to go see Twilight, so we started talking about the books and people would leave the room in a huff, they were so disgusted. So strange.

    If you liked it, you're a blithering idiot, and if you didn't, you're an intellectual snob with no heart.

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  41. Wiz - Some of my best friends love Twilight. I'm not kidding, they really do. And obviously, I am not above really sappy, really pointless, really dumb, really cheesy fiction. (Not that I'm saying that's what Twilight is. I'm just saying.) I'm kind of the target audience, I just didn't like it. But billions of my friends and neighbors did. I'm not judging.

    (My one friend who hates Jane Austen, HER I judge a little ;>)

    I'm just sick of hearing about the movie. Sick of it. SICK OF IT. And here I am - talking about it again. I'm so dumb.

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  42. seriously. and i love amber's testimony. :D

    also i gave you an award at my place - because i so look forward to reading your blog.

    www.thesassylime.com

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  43. hey did you hear about that twilight movie?? i think it's based on a book or something... ;)

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  44. I would rather hear about Twilight hype than what kind of dog the Obamas should get. I'm just saying.

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  45. Well, if you think the Twilight books are lacking, try the "Highlander" series by Karen Marie Moning. No vampires in sight, just "golden-skinned lusty fairy males" dripping from every page. A little insipid maybe but at least somebody gets lucky by the end of the book....

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  46. Twilight. Twilight. Twilight. The movie opens soon; did you catch that? All the YW in my ward and most of their mommies will be going Saturday at ten. SO EXCITING! Have you heard about the Twilight movie's...You are such a LIAR, Sue! Your head did NOT explode. My stalker-spy-cam clearly shows no explosion. Your lips didn't even swell.

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  47. Oh, gosh. And you know what's even worse? In all the interviews I have read or seen with the two stars, they come off like snotty, self-important JERKS. And I read the NICE publications - the ones sanctioned by the agents, managers and publicists. *sigh*

    Oh, but the junk mail thing? PRICELESS.

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  48. I thought of you yesterday when a friend of mine called (a friend who lives in a bubble and knows NOTHING about Twilight). She said she saw the preview and that her Aunt told her a Mormon wrote it and she freaked out a bit, because based on the preview alone she thought it was, and I quote, "an intensely dark, and evil movie." I thought of you and I giggled. The End.

    p.s. I'm renting the movie in the New Year for a good laugh. Wanna come?

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  49. It's on the imeem homepage too.

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  50. My dad asked me if I was going to see it.

    MY DAD.

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  51. So, I saw the movie tonight and loved it. It's way better than the book, but you do have to read the book to really GET the movie. I wrote a full review on my blog. :D

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  52. You don't like twilight? Well, you must think I'm an idiot for liking it and I AM NOT AN IDIOT! And stephanie Meyer could write circles around you, or whatever the people who are offended by the idea of you having your own opinion say when they make stupid comments.

    PS you can come over to the Wonderland, we're completely Twilight free. (I'm not that big on it either.) And then you could put me on your blogroll. I'm just sayin...

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  53. I've actually heard very little Twilight buzz in my neighborhood/ward. I'm sure some will go to see it (esp. young women) but I don't know any grown-ups who are planning to. Lucky me, huh?

    (Or maybe I'm a hermit and no one talks to me.)

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  54. I only read a few of these comments, but it seems to me that none of you enjoyed "Twilight's" greatest gift, the blessing of having a teen-ager INSIST on attending the midnight premier, seriously, if she didn't she might as well sign up to be a nun, she would have absolutely nothing left to live for, oh and of COURSE she would go to seminary and school the next day, gosh, what kind of MONSTER did I think she was? Yeah, guess how MY Friday morning went...

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  55. I think I'm one of three females not going.

    Weird.

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  56. I love Twilight, so of course I went. But you're right - the hype has been off the charts insane. Here's hoping your head stays non-exploded throughout the weekend.

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  57. With regard to the junk mail thing, my dad always rips up all the papers they send advertising whatever it is they want you to do and stuffs them into the "no postage necessary" envelope and mails that back to them. It's definitely not as funny as a brick, but it's a tad faster and you don't need so many supplies :)

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  58. I'm dying to see this hat you keep tipping.

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  59. I loved the books, and I'm boycotting the movie.
    But being bombarded with Twilight? You have no idea. Try going to a middle school the day after it came out. Practically no conversation went on without the words, "Oh my gosh Edward is so hot." Spoken in that exact way, too.

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  60. I didn't escape hearing about "Twilight" on the big game day here in Utah. A family group got together at my BIL's vacay place in Midway. The game wasn't even over before my SIL was making phone calls to the local theater in Heber to find out the show times. My poor BIL was trying to decide if he was going to the movie or drive back to SLC to see Coldplay in concert. Reason prevailed and he went to the concert.

    I wonder if they got in, because they assumed that the little old Heber movie theater wouldn't be sold out on a Saturday night. Mmm..like what else will all the Twilight freaks in the Heber Valley be doing on a Saturday night??

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  61. I think Amber needs some counceling. JK
    Anyway I would like to hit the theatre but I want to see the Bond movie more. Do I need therapy too, because I am not among the worshipers?

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  62. And I am wondering - how would all these married women who went breathlessly off at midnight to catch this flick - how would they feel if their husbands had left them at home with the kids to go with their buddies, hearts all palpatated, to get their flutters watching Catwoman or some other dimensionless female who inspires them with little hormonal flutterings?

    Hmmmm.

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  63. I admit, I loved the books.

    I waited until this afternoon to see the movie when all the squealing girls would be in school. It was, well, really not good. I wanted to like it, but it was crap.

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  64. I don't want to see it either, I'm going to Bolt with my kids instead.

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