Friday, September 12, 2008

Blog Parable the Second: Beware the Post-Takers

Pin It 1 And behold, on the twelfth day of the ninth month of the year of our lord two thousand and eight, there did appear in the land a post.

2 And behold, it was a post that was taken from the owner and changed only slightly; and behold, the post-taker did receive many accolades for her post.

3 And there were also in the land two other people who took the post and claimed it for their own, yea, without making a single change to the post they did claim it.

4 Now there was in the land a blogger, yay, even the original author of the post, and she did see their acts, and she cried out, saying "Surely I am cursed among all other women, oh, woe - WOE be unto me."

5 And behold her wrath was mighty, and she did stomp around the house exceedingly, even rending her garments, until her husband did say, "If thou wisheth it, I shall SMITE the post-takers with my mighty staff - - or perhaps if thou wouldst consider it, it wouldst be better to take a small break."

6 And the blogger did see the wisdom in this plan, and she did walk away from the computer and take the children to McDonalds with her husband, and they made merry for the space of an hour-and-a-half.

7 And after a space of several hours, the blogger did return to her computer, for she had begun to see the humor in the tale, but that was because she had not yet checked her email.

8 For behold, it came to pass that even more people did come forward and did confess by email to their sins, for behold, they did also take the post and claim it for their own; yea, they took even the comment plea from the sidebar.

9 Yay, one even confessed to taking the slightly out-of-date tagline, which seemeth to be kind of a waste of time, quite franklyeth.

10 And behold, the blogger began to have a migraine.

11 And she began to feel that it was all quite ridiculous, but she did implement a Copyright notice, which thou shalt see on the lower right, and she did also subscribe to Copyscape, that she might find all of the vagabonds in the land.

12 And she did declare this day Blog Amnesty Day, which should be known throughout the land.

13 And the blogger did say, if any of ye have sinned in this manner, go and sin no more.

14 And if ye have committed this crime, thou shalt email me and let me know that thou art sorrowful, and all shall be well.

15 But I say unto you, woe be unto those who do not take heed.

16 For if ye do not email me, I shall send my minions out to find thy blog with their all seeing eyes, and my mighty elves of plagiarism shall SMITE THEE in the eyeball.

17 Thus it is written, thus it shall be.

UPDATE: Apparently that post has become an email forward that's going around with no author. So two or three of the people who posted it, like this girl, Megan, posted it completely innocently. Just wanted to make sure people know that Megan, for one, never intended to swipe content. She just thought it was funny, and hey, how can I argue with THAT?! ;>

97 comments:

  1. I'm sorry you are dealing with this! But I have to say, I about peed my pants reading this post. Hilarious!! I hope your steps to curbing blog-theft work! It stinks to think there are people out there who think copying other people's work is ok.

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  2. Anonymous10:12 PM

    Hilarious!
    Liz

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  3. I'm betting this one gets 'lifted' too. :) You're so stinkin' funny, please don't ever stop writing.

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  4. Delurking here for a minute: You are my new scripture hero.

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  5. I liked the McDonalds part. And really, I would like to be JUST LIKE YOU (bloggishly speaking) but I believe that stooping to copying your posts as pathetic. Sorry about all the pathetic people out there who have stolen your words - you don't deserve it.

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  6. Behold, I am stealing this forthwith, like a cyber thief in the night ;-)

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  7. Wow. I don't want to bring up ancient history but I did write a short story in 9th grade called "I'm a Kawasaki"


    Pot....Kettle.

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  8. Has nobody thought of just posting "Hey, I read the best post today on Sue's blog, here's the link, go check it out." It's just sad that people feel like they have to steal from others to have a "good" blog. But I loved the parable - thanks!

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  9. Too Funny! Where do I sign up to be one of your Minions?

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  10. Very funny Mark. :>

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  11. I am not a nice person. I would want to punch these people in the mouth. However, if I actually saw one of these people, my natural cowardice would assert itself and I would not punch them in the mouth. I would feel bad. Not about wanting to punch them. About not actually doing it. So good thing I'm not a good enough blogger to get ripped off. Because it's just better not to start the vicious mouth punching cowardice cycle.

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  12. Sue,
    Damn straight !

    My feelings are, if I want to borrow something because I like it that much, I will ALWAYS say 'this came from so-and-so's blog" and provide the link top the original post of theirs.

    I also believe in writing a comment on the post I think is so great ASKING for permission to reprint it, if I'm blog-buddies with them.

    A little prior thought and consideration goes a long way to making and keeping friends.

    Whereas, carelessness and lack of credit given where credit is due often creates long-lasting hurt and distrust.

    You may quote me on that :)

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  13. "Quite franklyeth," said Sue. And Sue is very funny. And funny is only funny if it's, you know, you.

    Stealing just isn't funny. (Kind of like vampires aren't sexy.)

    But YOU are funny. VFI. Very Funny Indeed. Eth.

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  14. Your parables are always my favorite.

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  15. You really are a funny girl! Your sense of humor is amazing all the while you were ripped off. I am really sorry to hear it was more than once! I think a copyright was a good idea.

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  16. This is very funnily written but I know it wasn't funny. My friend Tiffany had her ENTIRE BLOG stolen and the thieves were making MONEY off of it through advertising.

    Now I'm all paranoid.

    Not that anyone would really want my stuff (look, I make up words like "funnily") but... well, I'm off to subscribe to copyscape.

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  17. WOE be unto you! See, I copy you, too, but only in your comment section. It might be a bit much if I just repeated the entire post, although I enjoyed all of it, not just that particular line.

    What's wrong with linking to a post you like and saying "Hey, check this out". What is the point of just copying it? I bet those people cheated in school, too.

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  18. Well, if anyone else starts blogging in biblical parables, you'll KNOW you've been copies.

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  19. Hey! I love, love, LOVE your blog! And this made me so sad. So I posted a nice little post on my lame, no adds yet, no comments ever, "mormon mommy blog" so that people can come read yours! But, beware. They never comment. I should know.

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  20. I have to know which post was copied so blatently and frequently..it must have been an awesome post and I'd love to read it. (I promise I won't steal it!)

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  21. This is so funny! I am glad that you can looketh upon it and laugheth!

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  22. HOLY CRAP! Who on earth is taking these posts word-for-word as if they would never be found?? Good night nurse....

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  23. WELL...Sue, beholdeth, I-eth liketh youreth blogeth besteth.

    Did you notice her page was protected by copyscape?

    And I thought it was funny that the award she got said -for this post only (referring to yours). Ha.

    Now, were you really able to relax at Mickey D's???

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  24. OH MY GOSH...Did you see this morning's post? Whatever. Plagiarist crybaby.

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  25. Thou art gifted-eth. And rocketh the funnies.

    Sorry about the thievery. I'm still willing to go egg their blogs...

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  26. Well, I'm glad it all happened; because then we got to hear you rant about it.

    How in the world did you find out people were copying your posts? What are there, like a gazillion mommy blogs out there?

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  27. I have to say, I'm actually SHOCKED that scores -- maybe even HUNDREDS -- of people have stolen your work.

    Because that's what it is. Stealing.

    They need good spankings. Seriously. What is wrong with people?!?

    Hope the copyright will get them to stop. But I wonder if that will deter anyone, really. If your conscience doesn't bother you, why should a little thing like the law?

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  28. Yeah Michelle, I saw that. I guess when you tell someone "Please take down my post, and please stop plagiarizing me," that's an exceptionally nasty thing to say. Oh brother.

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  29. Snort. Thieves are jerks, but you still make me snort.

    Oh, and Amen. Go in peace.

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  30. okay now I know for sure you're a comic genius. Since THIS is your response to all the madness. Pat yourself on the back. Then hug yourself. Then kiss your own hand.
    You're a beautiful person, this I know. For this post, it tells me so.

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  31. I'm glad you've taken action. I don't think my posts are good enough to be stolen.. or even linked for that matter. But who knows... I might go to the copy write dealy as well.

    So.. thanks for the post. I've just done my scripture reading for the day.

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  32. Maddison9:06 AM

    Sorry to hear all this is going on for you! But, you have to know... you are hilarious! You are a great writer and we're all waiting for your future book - whatever it will be, it'll be great!

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  33. Anonymous9:18 AM

    That other lady is lying. I know this, because I am one of the people who came to Sue to confess, that's why I'm staying anonymous if that makes sense.

    I knew someone would turn me in eventually so I emailed her and told her what I did. I apologized. I felt awful. I expected she would be really angry.

    Here is what she said to me by email: "Thank you for telling me. Please take the post down. No need for a public flogging. Don't beat yourself up, we've all done stupid things. Take care."

    That was it. That's class, o.k.?

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  34. ...um, can I steal your copyright notice? Because that's pretty funny, too.

    Plus, y'know, irony.

    j/k. Love you and all your posty goodness. I hope that blogger gets struck down with a good, old-fashioned, biblical plague.

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  35. That was even funnier than the original post. I am feeling bad for you, but also envious. Oh, to write so well that people would want to steal mg\y posts.

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  36. Seriously, I am loving these scripture parables! You're too funny!

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  37. Big bad blogger "parable" has already been removed. Hmph!

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  38. you are hilarious. i love reading your blog... you are HILARIOUS.. however, when reading the earlier blog (and comments) i thought, how stupid of people to be so lame to take someone else's writing and call it their own (so unoriginal... so pathetic). but then you do something like this parable and..
    i get it! that's what happens when you're superly damn good. ;) great job taking action.

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  39. I am so glad I started reading your blog! You are hilarious!!

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  40. That was brilliant. BRILLIANT.

    And I've had this happen to me with my BUSINESS. I had a website years ago and people copied my product and my entire sales text-- all of it. Made me flippin' mad.

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  41. Whenever I see/hear stories like this, my first thought, always, is, was it me?

    Of course it wasn't, but I always worry that somehow I've slept-stolen someone's awesome posts/recipes/new DSLR camera. Like I have narcoleptic-kleptomania or something.

    So, since it wasn't me (thank goodness!) -- who was it? My Reader cannot tell me.

    Somebody tell me WHO IT WAS!

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  42. Man...some people have all the luck. You're funny, clever, witty...and HIGHLY covetable! Sucks to be you.

    How did you FIND the post-stealers, though?

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  43. Oh, gosh, all I can say is that I must be fairly normal since I do all of those things you wrote about in your post that was stolen. Phew! (sorry about your posts being stolen--that is really awful and if I was good enough for someone to actually steal from me, it would make me mad as a hornet!)

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  44. Girl, I just want to copy this post verbatim and claim it as my own. It is THAT good.

    How come no one ever steals my maggot post?

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  45. Congratulations! You took a bad situation and made it work for you. I like this post even better than the post that was stolen. I wonder if anyone will steal it?

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  46. Good for you. Sorry it became necessary, but I'm glad there was something you could do about it.

    Hey, you know, maybe this means you've "made it" like rocks in my dryer, you know? You're popular enough to have to copywrite your blog...that's pretty successful in my book!

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  47. what do they say? imitation is the most sincere form of flattery?

    true, except when it's downright blatant copy-catting.

    what a ho-eth

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  48. okay, so I just found your blog the other day and let me bow down to you, bow down to the queen of all that is funny, the queen of all that is life. Your post about jogging with your ipod was freaking hilarious - I knew too well from wenst you come. Congrats on being absolutely fabulous:)

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  49. that was great sue! this should be put in a "How To Blog" book in the rules section

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  50. I've been huffing and puffing and groaning and relating the story to my husband (who tries to pretend like he cares) since I read about this yesterday. I can't believe it's been happening REPEATEDLY. Do people have no shame? Or pride, for that matter? That's what happens when people idolize you. YOu've always wanted to be the super cool one, right? Well, you've arrived!

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  51. While is this is sad/flattering/annoying/HILARIOUS, I just have to say that I've been a little tempted to steal your comment plea. But I knew it would be wrong, so I took your idea and tried REALLY HARD to make it my own. It's in my comment window, not sidebar. And it's not as funny. But just so's you know....this is it:

    leave a comment
    "Or I just might die. Not really. But a little bit inside, everytime you leave without commenting. You're killing me softly. With your silence."

    I beseech your forgiveness and from henceforth swear to never use your words to make myself look funny. I also swear to never write a post in parable format, even though it is SO VERY CLEVER, because I want Sweet Sue to be my friend and not be mad and write a post about me, even though she'd never tell who I was.

    By the way, I'm also DYING TO KNOW who is was. But it's good that you're being the bigger person. And no, that wasn't a fat joke.

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  52. Coming out of hiding to support you! I think you're awesome, I love this parable too, the first was HYSTERICAL!! BTW, I just submitted for your book, don't criticize me, I'll hide under my bed for a week sobbing uncontrollably! :)
    You're amazing, you handled the stealing masterfully!

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  53. You guys are all awesome and you're giving me way too much credit. Thanks for cheering me up.

    For the record, I don't care at if people use my comment plea. Feel free - just put me in your blogroll or something - you know how I live for that :>

    Also, the first blogger apologized and took down the post, so if you still have the link - please don't go over there threatening her with smitings, o.k.? We're all good.

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  54. I love this. And I have been thinking about copying the idea of biblical wording for a post but I'd come up with my own post. That's OK right? maybe I'll even link back here to point out that the idea isn't original.

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  55. The Life Cycle of a Blog really was a great post. LOL Not that I condone thievery or lying, but at least they "stole" a really great post! ha!

    that said, MAJOR BUMMER someone decided to just post and take credit like that... SHEESH!!! I hope the steps you've taken to correct the issue help!

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  56. Not a fan of copy cats. Sorry it happened to you. But you handled it very classy! Fo shizzle.

    I currently have someone trying to copy my life right now. It's not flattering and I'd like to smacketh the ho.

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  57. Two things.

    First, who do all these people think they are? Craziness I tell you that there are so many copy-cats out there! I'm glad that they have come forward though.

    Second, my husband recently discovered your blog (as in he saw me reading it and then clicked on the link to it on my blog and took a look around) and he thinks you are hilarious! Like I think he even laughed out loud at your honeymoon story and it takes a lot for him to laugh out loud.

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  58. So what you're saying is that I should stop copying and pasting from your blog? Sheesh. Picky.

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  59. I'm sorry it happened, but it made for a great post. I'm sad I just found out, thats what I get for going to the temple today, I missed all the good stuff.
    I cracked up and read it aloud to my husband. I think I would be torn between flattered and pissed off. But I know I am just a little bit jealous, In my wildest dreams I would never have the readers you have.

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  60. Oh I just love it when you go all biblical on us! I confess that when I saw the comments thingy I was tempted, for behold, it was the funniest thing I had seen in my many years--but I did overcome the temptation. I'm glad I do not need to fear your minions.

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  61. You crack me up. I'm sorry that people were stealing your stuff though. I've found that happens quite a bit on this world wide web.

    I believe you handled it beautifully.

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  62. Only you dear, could make this so dang funny. You slay me. But please not for reals, cause I think too much of you to ever try and steal a post. I only aspire. We are still allowed to aspire aren't we?

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  63. Alison - that isn't necessary at all. I mean, unless I need to start finding ways to link to Moses every time I want to get bibical. :>

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  64. I seriously love your guts!

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  65. OMG I love you. That was the best thing ever.

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  66. I feel cursed among the land. I have now visited your blog and well you are pretty dang funny so now I do want to take stuff and copy it. (the parable) Sorry for what has happened to you, Honestly had I read this on your blog I would have given credit. It is being email around and that is how I received it, the email has no author. SORRY. Anyhoo long story short sorry about all this and your forgiveness is welcome. I also appreciate you being kind and decent enough to not post my name and blog (after awhile)not knowing the circumstances. I did however see my site hits going up and think whoa I'm a popular gal, apparantly I was but for the wrong reasons. (sigh) I understand authors want credit and it is deserved. SO hats off to your funny stuff.

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  67. I stalk your blog, I will admit to that. You make me laugh! Thank you for sharing your humor with everyone else. You are quite a talented lady. Keep it up! (P.S.- I did NOT steal your blog, I just let people know about it).

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  68. But still want to add you to my blog stocking list now cuz it is pretty dang funny.. Sorry Sorry. Someone take away the cursings............ :(

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  69. I sure wish there was a way all bloggers, no matter who the host site, could copy-protect all our stuff. To me, that's the huge downside of blogging.

    Not that I'll stop writing, mind you.

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  70. Sorry Megan. You were the second or third blog I became aware of that had my post up, so you're not the only person I was talking about. Thanks for letting me know what happened.

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  71. But something fantastical has happened because of it all. I have a new found place to blog stock!!! A blogging friedship has sprung for the depths of copyright dispair. Happy thought!!!! SO I will return if that is okay. :)
    You need some ads on your site you get a tons of hits. May as well make some money money money monnnnnayyyyy for the trama.

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  72. Wow, Sue! I now know the most famous author of all time: Anonymous! You have written some amazing stuff.

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  73. Holy cow you are so funny!

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  74. This was seriously funny. I hope that the good will outweigh the bad in this situation!

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  75. So I just read the post in question to my husband. He wants to know when you met me to write such an accurate post about me.

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  76. I'm assuming linking to your posts is all cool, right??? I had that happen once too and I decided to just overlook it. It's pretty pathetic if you have to copy me... On a positive note, if people are lifting your work, it is only because you are writing such great stuff. The copyright thing is the best way to go, that and writing scripture.

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  77. I LOVE LINKS. Linking is always, always, always good. You don't even have to ask, just link. ME LIKE LINKING.

    In case you didn't catch that, I think linking is good.

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  78. And behold, on the fourteenth day of the ninth month of the year--oh whatever. Fantastic post. They may have power to steal thy words, but thou hast power to write really good posts that make them look totally stupid.

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  79. This was awesome! Sorry you have had to deal with this, but I think you have handled it perfectly.

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  80. I don't know if you still read comments once they get past 82, but I just wanted to say that my jaw just dropped (a little; it's still attached to my face though) because my very first idea for a blog post, before I ever started my blog, was for a post that would be called "The life cycle of a blog." It was going to have a chart with arrows going in a circle. But I never got around to writing it, and now I'm glad, because, while I haven't Googled or dug in your archives to find yours yet, I'm still sure yours is much funnier than mine would have been. But I'm still feeling pleased with myself that I had the same concept you did (all on my own.)

    Now, as for plagiarizing yours outright, that's a whole 'nother story, and shameful indeed. I can't relate to that *at all.*

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  81. oh this was wonderful. i am totally counting it as my scripture reading for the day. if you could just add a prayer, i would be covered.

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  82. Megan really is a sweetheart! I'm glad you cleared that up for everyone. She has you posted on her blog...says you've got some funny stuff. Yep, I agree! I'll have to check back when I need a pick me up. Happy Day!

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  83. Just read your update. Your blog post is now a forward??? You're super ultra mega famous! And obviously totally awesome.

    I would offer to be your personal assistant, except I don't talk on the phone either. :)

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  84. Okay, I went and found your post and, yeah, it was a lot funnier than mine would have been. I would totally steal it (NOT!)

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  85. To all blogger peoples: check a post of yours, go to www.copyscape.com and paste in the URL of your post. It *should* tell you if someone is ripping off your post, even if they change some words.

    Check it out.

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  86. For serious? One of your posts was so universally adored it got sent around as an email forward?!

    Wow.

    I don't even aspire to be that famous, and I'm pretty dang ambitious. Congrats!

    And condolences as well. Ouchie. I can so imagine the headache.

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  87. I just found your blog. And I LOVE it! You are so funny. I'll be e-stalking you now forever. :) only kidding...

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  88. Yah, O one found with Wisdom and Wit.
    And I here-to didst have to reread the great text of thou to fully comprehend.
    But nowst that I have comprehendeth, I hail thee,
    O great one of Wisdom and Wit.
    And I willst honor thou with a great post.
    And I promist to thee that I havest never absconded with thy words.
    Ner'ily not, ner'ily not.

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  89. Sue - I'd just like to add myself to the growing list of people to tell you how amazing you were through all of this.

    You worked through it and in the process educated others AND did so in your own fantastic style.

    It took me this long just to figure out how to not be snarky in commenting because I was so frustrated for you :) and it's a long-standing pet peeve.

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  90. Just so you know I love your blog. You inspire me to find the funny within myself and be funny too, but never to steal. I won't steal from you. I HATE it when people steal jokes. If you are going to tell a joke you heard at least when people laugh say something like "isn't that funny, such and such or so and so, said that to me the ohter day...." So to make you feel better about the entire situation I will do the following. First, leave you a long comment. Second link to you. What better form of flattery is there? You will be found on my blog as "navel gazing at its finest".

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  91. You are brilliant. I'm so sorry this had to happen to you but I love this post so much.

    Lesson for us all. Or should I say Catechism?

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  92. My question only is this, and it has nothing to do with post-taking: How did you go about the house "rending [your] garments" and your husband let you off with only going to McDonalds? Speaking as a husband, if there was any garment-rending going on with my wife, McDonalds would not be my first choice. :)

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  93. OK, so I'm REALLY glad that I asked for permission when I used that post. I do feel that I gave proper credit. Hopefully I will not have to face eternal damnation like the others. Crazy.

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  94. Heather, no need to ask permission. People can link and post whatever they want, I could care less.

    It's the people who post stuff and pretend they wrote it that bother me.

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